101+ FFXIV Puns: Unleash the Warrior of Wit!

In the realm of Final Fantasy XIV, where epic battles and captivating quests await, there’s also a secret weapon that has been passed down through countless patches: puns. From the moment you set foot in Eorzea, you’ll be met with a barrage of chuckle-worthy quips that will leave you giggling between slaying monsters and completing FATEs.Whether you’re a seasoned adventurer or a fresh-faced sprout, this realm of puns has something for everyone. So, grab your favorite tankard of ale, sit back, and prepare to embark on a hilarious journey that will make you question your sanity and laugh out loud all at once.From the witty banter of your fellow adventurers to the groan-inducing dad jokes uttered by NPCs, there’s no shortage of humor in this virtual world. These puns will shield you from boredom during even the toughest boss fights, brighten up your dungeon delves, and make your crafting sessions a laugh-a-minute experience.So, prepare your laughter muscles, gather your puns-loving crew, and dive headfirst into the world of FFXIV puns. Let’s explore the lighter side of Eorzea, where puns reign supreme and laughter is always just a quip away! As the saying goes, ‘To pun, or not to pun? That is the ques-tion…’

FFXIV: A Realm of Puns and Quips

1. What do you call a Lalafell who loves puns? A short-cir-pun!
2. What do you call a Miqo’te who’s always getting into trouble? A cat-astrophe!
3. What do you call a Hyur who’s always losing their way? A lost cause!
4. What do you call an Au Ra who’s always getting into fights? A dragon-slayer!
5. What do you call a Roegadyn who’s always making people laugh? A giant-pun! 😜
6. What do you call a Viera who’s always running late? A bunny-bopper!
7. What do you call a Hrothgar who’s always making mistakes? A bear-d!
8. What do you call a Doman who’s always getting lost in the woods? A lost-samurai!
9. What do you call an Elezen who’s always getting into arguments? A leg-end!
10. What do you call a Garlean who’s always getting in trouble with the law? A bad-garle-an!
11. What do you call a chocobo who’s always running around in circles? A feather-brain! 😜
12. What do you call a moogle who’s always getting into mischief? A trouble-moogle!
13. What do you call a retainer who’s always losing their keys? A key-per!
14. What do you call a dungeon boss who’s always getting defeated? A raid-fail!
15. What do you call a group of players who are always wiping in a dungeon? A wipe-out!
16. What do you call a player who’s always getting kicked from their party? A party-pooper!
17. What do you call a player who’s always complaining about their gear? A gear-grinder!
18. What do you call a player who’s always bragging about their achievements? A show-off!
19. What do you call a player who’s always making bad puns? A pun-isher! 🤣
20. What do you call a player who’s always getting carried by their friends? A free-rider!

The Lighter Side of Eorzea: Hilarious Puns for Every Class

1. What do you call a Lalafell who’s always in trouble? A taru-ble pun-dit!
2. Why did the Miqo’te get lost in the forest? Because they didn’t fur-see the path ahead!
3. What do you call a Roegadyn who’s always hungry? 🍖 A belly-ache-saurus! 🍖
4. Why did the Hyur get a cold? Because they didn’t wear a scarf-ace!
5. What do you call an Elezen who’s always late? A tardy-knee!
6. Why did the Au Ra get a sunburn? Because they didn’t wear sun-scales!
7. What do you call a Viera who’s always on the move? A hare-y-potter!
8. Why did the Machinist get a headache? Because they used their drill-bit!
9. What do you call a Monk who’s always meditating? A zen-trainer!
10. Why did the Black Mage get lost in the library? Because they couldn’t find the spell-ing section! 📚
11. What do you call a Paladin who’s always tripping over their own feet? A holy-roller!
12. Why did the White Mage get a papercut? Because they were using a sharp-scicle!
13. What do you call a Bard who’s always playing the same song? A one-hit-wonder!
14. Why did the Dragoon get kicked out of the castle? Because they were lance-ing too much!
15. What do you call a Summoner who’s always losing their carbuncle? A forget-me-knot!
16. Why did the Ninja get arrested? Because they were caught steal-thing! 🥷
17. What do you call a Scholar who’s always studying? A book-worm!
18. Why did the Astrologian get a headache? Because they were star-gazing too much! 🔭
19. What do you call a Dark Knight who’s always complaining? A brood-ing-mage!
20. Why did the Samurai get lost in the bamboo forest? Because they couldn’t find the sword-path! ⚔️

Tanking the Puns: Jokes That Will Shield You from Boredom

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
2. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time!
3. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
4. What do you call a lazy kangaroos? A pouch potato!
5. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
6. Why did the lettuce get lost in the supermarket? It couldn’t find the salad dressing! 😆
7. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
8. Why was the scarecrow so good at math? Because he had a lot of field experience!
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
10. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
11. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
12. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
13. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind as a batfish!
14. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer!
15. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well!
16. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
17. Why did the tomato turn red? It was embarrassed!
18. What do you call a kangaroo that can’t jump? A pouch potato!
19. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two tired!
20. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!

DPS Delights: Dealing Out Witty One-Liners

1. Why did the DPS officer get arrested? For cracking too many jokes!
2. What do you call a DPS officer with a sense of humor? A pun-isher!
3. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always telling puns? A traffic comedian!
4. 🚓🚨Why did the DPS officer pull over the car? Because he wanted to have a little chat!
5. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always getting into trouble? A reckless driver!
6. Why did the DPS officer get a speeding ticket? Because he was in a hurry to make a joke!
7. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always late? A time bandit!
8. Why did the DPS officer get a divorce? Because his wife couldn’t handle his puns! 😂
9. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always getting lost? A directionally challenged officer!
10. Why did the DPS officer get a promotion? Because he was the funniest officer in the force!
11. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always getting into accidents? A bumper car!
12. Why did the DPS officer get a sunburn? Because he was too busy cracking jokes in the sun! 🌞
13. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always making excuses? A fibber on the force!
14. Why did the DPS officer get a cold? Because he was caught in a draft of puns! 🥶
15. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always getting into trouble? A traffic jam!
16. Why did the DPS officer get a promotion? Because he was the most pun-derful officer in the force! ✨
17. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always getting lost? A GPS-challenged officer!
18. Why did the DPS officer get a divorce? Because his wife couldn’t handle his puns and groaners!
19. What do you call a DPS officer who’s always getting transferred? A roving officer!
20. Why did the DPS officer get a speeding ticket? Because he was in a hurry to make a joke that would make everyone laugh!

Healer Humor: Mending Spirits with Side-Splitting Jokes

• What do you call a bandage that’s always laughing? A giggle plaster.
• Why did the aspirin cross the road? To go to the head of the queue.
• What do you call a doctor with a bad bedside manner? A pillow puncher.
• Why did the nurse get lost in the hospital? She took a bad turn.
• What do you call a witch doctor who only works on feet? A podiatrist.
• Why do surgeons make the best dancers? Because they have a steady pulse.
• What do you call a doctor who can’t stop telling jokes? A “knee” slapper.
• Why did the patient have to see a urologist? Because he was feeling a little below par.
• What do you call a doctor who can’t keep a secret? A blabbermouth.
• Why did the doctor join a choir? To help patients sing their praises.
• What do you call a doctor who loves puns? A “bone” fide punster.
• Why did the patient run away from the doctor? Because they were afraid of the “shots”.
• What do you call a doctor who’s always on the go? A “rush” hour doctor.
• Why did the doctor give up on his diet? Because he couldn’t stomach it.
• What do you call a doctor who specializes in car accidents? A “fender” bender doctor.
• Why did the doctor start playing the piano? To heal his “sore” fingers.
• What do you call a doctor who’s always late? A fashionably “sick” doctor.
• Why did the doctor take a break? Because he was feeling “under the weather”.

Crafting a Laugh: Puns That Will Forge Unforgettable Memories

1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
2. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
3. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
4. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
5. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
6. Why did the dog go to the bank? To get his loan approved!
7. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well!
8. Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its neck.
9. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
10. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two tired!
11. Why did the scarecrow get promoted? Because he was outstanding in his field!
12. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
13. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
14. Why did the dog go to the bank? To get his loan approved! 🐕
15. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
16. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
17. Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its neck.
18. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🐄
19. Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two tired!
20. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well! 🍌

Gathering Gags: Jokes That Will Grow On You

• What do you call a tree that can’t stop telling jokes? A stand-up comic. 😁
• Why don’t plants make good dancers? They have two left feet.
• How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
• Why was the computer cold? It had a virus.
• How does a lazy snail get around? On a slow-coach.
• Why did the student eat his homework? He wanted to get good grades.
• What do you call a cow that jumps over the moon? A bull-e-vator.
• Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing. 🍅
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
• Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he’s such a fun guy.
• What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
• How do trees get on the internet? They log in. 🌳
• What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
• Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired.
• What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
• Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
• What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
• What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick.

Raiding for Laughs: Hilarious Puns to Brighten Up Dungeon Delves

1. What do you call a rogue with a bad attitude? A dungeon grumpkin. 🧙‍♂️
2. Why did the wizard leave the party? Because he wanted to cast a spell on his own. 🧙‍♀️
3. What do you call a healing potion that’s made from rare herbs? A holy-grail. 🌿✨
4. Why are wizards so good at playing peek-a-boo? Because they can make themselves disappear! 🎩
5. What do you get when you cross a dragon with a jester? A fire-breathing comedian. 🐲🃏
6. Why did the barbarian use a flyswatter in the dungeon? Because he wanted to slay the giant roomba. 🧹⚔️
7. What do you call a goblin who’s always getting lost? A dungeon wanderer. 🗺️👣
8. Why are mimics so annoying? Because they’re always trying to chest-bump you. 💪📦
9. What do you call a necromancer who’s always running late? A deathly procrastinator. 💀⌛
10. Why did the gnome get kicked out of the tavern? Because he was gnome-ing around. 🍺🤏
11. What do you call a wizard who’s lost their wand? A magicless muggle. 🧙‍♂️🚫🪄
12. Why did the barbarian get lost in the forest? Because he didn’t have a map, just an ax to grind. 🪓🌲
13. What do you call a dwarf who’s always snoring? A deep-sleeper. 💤⛏️
14. Why did the bard get fired from the adventuring party? Because he was always singing off-key. 🎶🎤
15. What do you call a halfling who’s really good at hiding? A hobbit-can-hide. 👣🍃
16. Why are mimics so popular? Because they’re chest-ers. 📦😂
17. What do you call a wizard who’s always making mistakes? A spell-caster. 🧙‍♂️✨
18. Why did the adventurer get lost in the dungeon? Because he was following a bread-crumb trail that kept disappearing. 🍞👣
19. What do you call a group of doppelgangers who are always arguing? A squabble of clones. 👥🗣️
20. Why are dragons so good at playing poker? Because they’re always holding a full house. 🏠🐉

Glamour Shots: Jokes That Will Make You Look Sharp

1. What do you call a glamour shot of a porcupine? A prickly portrait!
2. Why did the photographer use a potato to take glamour shots? 🥔 Because it was a tuber-cular lens!
3. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a glamour model? A fang-tastic pose!
4. What’s the difference between a glamour shot and a mugshot? One is a touch-up, the other is a touch-down!
5. Why did the supermodel get lost on the way to her glamour shoot? She couldn’t find her way out of a paper bag!
6. What do you call a glamour shot of a cow? A moooooo-del!
7. Why did the photographer use a mirror to take glamour shots? Because it was a self-portrait!
8. What do you get when you cross a glamour shot with a selfie? A camera-ready masterpiece!
9. Why did the makeup artist use glitter on the glamour model? To add some sparkle to her shimmer!
10. What do you call a glamour shot of a ballerina? A twirling masterpiece!
11. Why did the fashion photographer use a magnifying glass? To capture all the tiny details!
12. What do you call a glamour shot of a cat? A purr-fect portrait!
13. Why did the photographer use a banana as a prop? Because it was a peeling pose!
14. What do you call a glamour shot of a chef? A culinary masterpiece!
15. Why did the makeup artist use green eyeshadow? To give the model a “leafy” look!
16. What do you call a glamour shot of an architect? A structured masterpiece!
17. Why did the photographer use a kaleidoscope? To create a shimmering, colorful effect!
18. What do you call a glamour shot of a gardener? A blooming masterpiece!
19. Why did the fashion photographer use a fisheye lens? To give the model a “wide-eyed” look!
20. What do you call a glamour shot of a musician? A rhythmic masterpiece!

FATE-tastic Puns: Jokes That Will Make Your Questline a Hoot

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
2. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye-deer!
3. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
4. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
5. What do you call a fish with no eyes? I don’t sea!
6. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
7. What do you call a tree that can’t stop talking? A chatterbox!
8. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
   🔟 What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer!
10. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
11. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
12. What do you call a fish with no eyes? I don’t sea!
13. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
14. What do you call a tree that can’t stop talking? A chatterbox!
15. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Flounder!
17. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!
18. What do you call a cow with no legs? Lean beef!
19. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!

Chocobo Humor: Jokes That Will Make You Reign Supreme

1. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always in a good mood? A screamer of joy!
2. What do you call a Chocobo that loves to travel? A winging it specialist!
3. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always late? A feather brain! 🐔
4. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always telling jokes? A pecker of humor!
5. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always getting into trouble? A winging rebel!
6. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always eating? A gobbler of feathers!
7. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always sleeping? A snoozy snoozer! 😴
8. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always arguing? A squawker of complaints!
9. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always singing? A songbird of the skies!
10. What do you call a Chocobo that’s always dancing? A dancer of delight!

Minion Madness: Puns That Will Summon a Smile

1. What do you call a minion with a PhD? A Doctor of Mininology!
2. Why are minions always so excited to go to work? Because they love being in the company of others!
3. What do you call a minion who’s always late? A “Minion-tard”!
4. Why did the minion get lost in the supermarket? Because he couldn’t find the banana-isle!
5. What do you call a minion who’s afraid of the dark? A “Night-mare-ion”!
6. What do you call a minion who’s always getting into trouble? A “Rascal-ion”!
7. Why did the minion cross the road? To get to the other banana! 🍌
8. What do you call a minion who’s always complaining? A “Whiny-ion”!
9. Why did the minion get a speeding ticket? Because he was driving too fast in his “Peel-mobile”!
10. What do you call a minion who’s always making jokes? A “Pun-ion”! 😎
11. Why did the minion get a job at the library? Because he wanted to “shelve” minions!
12. What do you call a minion who’s always getting into accidents? A “Crash-ion”!
13. Why did the minion go to the doctor? Because he had a “banana-peel-er”!
14. What do you call a minion who’s always freezing? A “Cold-ion”!
15. Why did the minion get a job as a gardener? Because he wanted to “banana-split”! 🍌
16. What do you call a minion who’s always getting lost? A “Clueless-ion”!
17. Why did the minion go to the bank? To get a “banana-loan”!
18. What do you call a minion who’s always getting into fights? A “Bully-ion”!
19. Why did the minion get a job as a teacher? Because he wanted to “minion-ize” the students!
20. What do you call a minion who’s always getting into trouble? A “Bad-ion”!

Lalafell Laughs: Jokes That Will Leave You Giggling Like a Little Potato

1. Why are Lalafells so good at hiding? Because they’re smol and potato-shaped! 🥔
2. What do you call a Lalafell who can’t stop telling jokes? A pun-dersized comedian.
3. Why don’t Lalafells like to play hide-and-seek? Because they’re always too easy to find!
4. What do you call a Lalafell who loves to sing? A spud-tacular vocalist. 🥔
5. Why are Lalafells the best dancers? Because they’ve got rhythm and spuds!
6. What do you get when you cross a Lalafell with a potato? A spuddy little cutie. 🥔
7. Why did the Lalafell get lost in the forest? Because he was too short to see over the bushes!
8. What do you call a Lalafell who’s always getting into trouble? A sprout of mischief.
9. Why did the Lalafell join the army? To protect his spuddy buddies! 🥔
10. What do you call a Lalafell who loves to party? A spud with attitude.
11. Why are Lalafells so good at multitasking? Because they can peel potatoes and tell jokes at the same time!
12. What do you call a Lalafell who’s always telling tall tales? A spuddy liar.
13. Why did the Lalafell cross the road? To get to the other tuber. 🥔
14. What do you call a Lalafell who’s always late? A spuddle of time.
15. Why are Lalafells so bad at basketball? Because they can’t reach the hoop!
16. What do you call a Lalafell who loves to sleep? A spuddy snoozer. 🥔
17. Why are Lalafells so good at swimming? Because they’re naturally buoyant!
18. What do you call a Lalafell who’s always making messes? A spuddy troublemaker.
19. Why did the Lalafell get kicked out of the library? Because he was making too much noise!
20. What do you call a Lalafell who loves to cook? A spuddy chef. 🥔

Festive Follies: Puns for Every Eorzean Holiday

1. Why don’t Eorzeans eat snails during Starlight? Because they’re too slow-poke-y! 🐌
2. What do you call a snowman with a sense of humor? A Snowpun! ⛄️
3. Why did the Moogles get kicked out of the Starlight revelry? Because they were mistletoeing around!
4. What do you call a Lalafell who’s good at making puns? A master of the dad jokes!
5. Why did the Miqo’te get lost in the Twelveswood during Hatching-tide? Because they kept following the bunny trails! 🐣
6. What do you call a Namazu who loves to party? A Fin-tastic reveler! 🐟
7. Why did the Roegadyn get so drunk during the Moonfire Faire? Because they couldn’t resist the yoshi-tail ale! 🌺
8. What do you call a Cactuar who’s always late? A prick-ly procrastinator! 🌵
9. Why did the Gobbue get banned from the Thavnairian Dance Festival? Because it kept moon-walking into everyone! 💃🏽
10. What do you call a Chocobo who’s always in a good mood? A happy-go-clucky! 🐥
11. Why did the Magnai get so angry during the Heavensturn Festival? Because he couldn’t find any mochi! 🍡
12. What do you call a Viera who’s a master of disguise? A Bunny-meleon! 🐇
13. Why did the Hyur get so excited for the Valentione’s Day Festival? Because they were hoping to find their soul-mate-rite! 💖
14. What do you call a Lalafell who’s always bragging? A big-headed potato! 🥔
15. Why did the Miqo’te get into trouble during the All Saints’ Wake Festival? Because they kept scaring people with their creepy masks! 👻
16. What do you call a Namazu who’s always getting into mischief? A fin-atic! 🐟
17. Why did the Roegadyn get so sunburned during the Summer Festival? Because they were grilling in the scorching heat! ☀️
18. What do you call a Cactuar who’s always getting lost? A prick-ly wanderer! 🌵
19. Why did the Gobbue get banned from the Starlight Celebration? Because it kept crashing into the Christmas trees! 🎄
20. What do you call a Chocobo who’s always up for a challenge? A courageous clucker! 🐔

Rosana C. Nogueira

Especialista de Seguros | Key Account | Executivo de Negócios | Gestão Comercial