112+ Denver Puns To Make You Mile High With Laughter!

Welcome to Denver, the vibrant city where the altitude is high and the puns are even higher! Get ready for a pun-tastic adventure as we take a whirlwind tour through Denver’s iconic landmarks, uncovering a treasure trove of puns that will leave you laughing out loud.

As you stroll through the Mile High City, you’ll find yourself surrounded by skyscrapers that reach for the sky. But fear not, for Denver’s puns will help you keep your feet planted firmly on the ground. From the Colorado Capitol to Union Station, no place is safe from our puns. We’ll scale the Rocky Mountain peaks of humor and venture into Larimer Square, where laughter echoes through the streets. So buckle up, Denver-se to pun, and let’s explore the city’s pun-tential.

Prepare to embark on a Golden, CO punny adventure, where even the Red Rocks Amphitheater whispers witty remarks. The Denver Art Museum will showcase pun-tastic exhibits that will tickle your funny bone. And at Union Station, where trains have been replaced by giggles, we’ll prove that puns are on the right track. So, dear reader, join us on this hilarious journey through Denver. We promise that by the end, you’ll be saying, “Holy smokes! These Denver puns are un-Bear-able!” Let’s dive right in and see what pun-derful discoveries await us in the Mile High City!

The Mile High City: A Pun-orama

  1. What do you call a mountain that makes jokes? A pun-derful peak!
  2. Why did the mountain climber get lost? Because he didn’t know his altitude! ๐Ÿ—ป
  3. What do you call a mountain that’s always getting into trouble? A rebel with a peak!
  4. Why did the mountain get a cold? Because it wasn’t wearing its snow-cap! โ„๏ธ
  5. What do you call a mountain that’s always on time? A punctual peak!
  6. Why did the mountain get a speeding ticket? Because it was going downhill too fast!
  7. What do you call a mountain that’s always arguing? A contentious peak!
  8. Why did the mountain go to the doctor? Because it had a rocky relationship!
  9. What do you call a mountain that’s always getting into fights? A pugnacious peak!
  10. Why did the mountain get a tattoo? Because it wanted to show off its peak performance!
  11. What do you call a mountain that’s always trying to get ahead? An ambitious peak!
  12. Why did the mountain get a library card? Because it wanted to check out some summit reading! ๐Ÿ“š
  13. What do you call a mountain that’s always getting lost? A peak-a-boo peak!
  14. Why did the mountain get a job as a tour guide? Because it knew all the best trails! ๐Ÿ—บ๏ธ
  15. What do you call a mountain that’s always singing? A melodic peak!
  16. Why did the mountain get a hair cut? Because it wanted to rock a new peak!
  17. What do you call a mountain that’s always trying to impress others? A show-off peak!
  18. Why did the mountain get a PhD? Because it wanted to be an expert in peak-ology! ๐ŸŽ“
  19. What do you call a mountain that’s always breaking the rules? A defiant peak!
  20. Why did the mountain get a divorce? Because it had a rocky marriage! ๐Ÿ’

Denver-se to Pun

  1. Denver-se to Pun, but I’ll give you a brake.
  2. Mile High puns, don’t be afraid to altitude.
  3. Rocky Mountain puns, they’ll leave you boulder-ed over.
  4. Colorado puns, they’re a real peak performance.
  5. No pun-intended, just Denver-se to make you laugh.
  6. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I’m making a mint.
  7. I’m not lion when I say, these puns are roar-some.
  8. Pun-derful Denver-se, it’s a pun-orama.
  9. Puns are a real hoot, so Denver-se to laugh.
  10. Don’t be a pun-derachiever, Denver-se to the occasion.
  11. I’m Denver-se to pun, but I’m also full of hot air. ๐ŸŒฌ๏ธ
  12. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I should be in a museum. ๐Ÿ–ผ๏ธ
  13. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I’ve been banned from all the punshops. ๐Ÿšซ
  14. My Denver-se puns are so bad, they’re almost good. ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  15. I’m Denver-se to pun, but I’m not Denver-se to stop. ๐Ÿ’ช
  16. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I make dad jokes look cool. ๐Ÿ˜Ž
  17. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I can make a pun out of anything. ๐Ÿ“
  18. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I’m practically a pun-slinger. ๐Ÿค 
  19. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I’m the pun-isher. ๐Ÿ‘Š
  20. I’m so Denver-se to pun, I’m the pun-isher, part two. ๐Ÿคฃ

Colorado’s Capitol of Comedy

  1. What do you call a comedian from Colorado Springs? A Rocky Mountain High-larious.
  2. Why did the comedian move to Denver? Because it’s the Capitol of Comedy.
  3. What do you call a mime from Boulder? A Boulder-dashing comedian.
  4. Why do comedians love Fort Collins? Because it’s a Fort-tastic place to crack jokes.
  5. What do you call a stand-up comic from Pueblo? A Pueblo-perfectionist.
    ๐Ÿ˜‚ 6. What do you call a comedian who performs at the Red Rocks Amphitheater? A Red Rocks-steady funnyman.
  6. Why did the comedian cross the Colorado River? To get to the punchline.
  7. What’s the difference between a comedian from Colorado and a comedian from California? One is Rocky Mountain Funny and the other is Golden State Guffaw.
  8. What do you call a comedian who’s always getting lost in the mountains? A lost and pun-dered soul.
  9. What’s the best way to make a Colorado comedian laugh? Tell them a joke about the Rockies.
    ๐Ÿ˜‚ 11. Why are Colorado comedians so good at improv? Because they’re used to dealing with the unpredictable weather.
  10. What do you call a comedian who specializes in jokes about snow? A snow-capped comic.
  11. Why did the comedian get a job at a ski resort? To work on their downhill wit.
  12. What do you call a comedian who’s a huge fan of the Denver Broncos? A touchdown-tastic joke master.
  13. Why did the comedian run away from the moose? Because it was a mighty pun-isher.
    ๐Ÿ˜‚ 16. What do you call a comedian who performs in a tiny cabin in the woods? A backcountry backcracker.
  14. Why are Colorado comedians so humble? Because they know they’re not as funny as the mountains.
  15. What do you call a comedian who’s always in trouble with the law? A criminally hilarious jokester.
  16. Why did the comedian get banned from the comedy club? Because their jokes were too high-altitude.
  17. What do you call a comedian who’s afraid of heights? A stand-up comedian with altitude sickness.
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Peak Pun-formance in Denver

  1. What do you call a mountain with a great sense of humor? A peak pun-former!
  2. Why did the mountain climber get lost? Because he didn’t have a map of the moun-tains.
  3. Why did the mountain go to the doctor? It had a rocky relationship.
  4. Why did the mountain get a sunburn? Because it was too high- and-mighty.
  5. What do you call a mountain that’s always happy? A peak-a-boo!
  6. Why did the mountain need a new pair of socks? Because it had bunions! ๐Ÿ”๏ธ
  7. What do you call a mountain that’s always on the go? A rambling peak.
  8. Why did the mountain get arrested? Because it was caught stealing puns. ๐Ÿ‘ฎ
  9. What do you call a mountain that’s always in a good mood? A hap-peak.
  10. Why did the mountain go to the dentist? To get its cavities filled. ๐Ÿฆท
  11. What do you call a mountain that’s always in the spotlight? A stage peak.
  12. Why did the mountain get a speeding ticket? Because it was going down-hill too fast. ๐Ÿš”
  13. What do you call a mountain that’s always getting in trouble? A peak-a-boo! ๐Ÿ™ˆ
  14. Why did the mountain get a divorce? Because it was always rocky.
  15. What do you call a mountain that’s always in a good mood? A peak-a-boo! ๐Ÿ˜Š
  16. Why did the mountain get a job as a park ranger? To keep an eye on the peaks.
  17. What do you call a mountain that’s always in a fog? A peak-a-boo! ๐ŸŒซ๏ธ
  18. Why did the mountain get a makeover? Because it wanted to look sharp. ๐Ÿ’…
  19. What do you call a mountain that’s always making mistakes? A peak-a-boo! ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ
  20. Why did the mountain get a new haircut? Because it was split-peaked.

Rocky Mountain High on Puns

  1. I got high on the Rocky Mountains once. It was a rocky experience.
  2. What do you call a mountain climber who can’t stop telling jokes? A summit comedian.
  3. Why did the mountain climber get lost? Because he didn’t peak his interest.
  4. What do you call a mountain with a sense of humor? An a-peak comedian. ๐ŸŒฒ
  5. Why did the rock climber get a promotion? Because he scaled the corporate ladder.
  6. What do you call a mountain climber who always gets lost? A peak-a-boo player.
  7. Why did the mountain climber get a divorce? Because his wife was a pain in the neck. โ›ฐ๏ธ
  8. What do you call a mountain climber who can’t stop singing? A rock and roll mountaineer.
  9. Why did the mountain climber cross the road? To get to the other summit.
  10. What do you call a mountain climber who eats too much? A boulder belly.
  11. Why did the mountain climber get a job at the ski resort? Because he was a pro at sliding down slopes.
  12. What do you call a mountain climber who is always late? A peak procrastinator.
  13. Why did the mountain climber get a speeding ticket? Because he was going down the mountain too fast. ๐Ÿš—
  14. What do you call a mountain climber who is always getting into trouble? A rocky road warrior. โ›ฐ๏ธ
  15. Why did the mountain climber get a new pair of boots? Because his old ones were too peak-y.
  16. What do you call a mountain climber who is afraid of heights? A ground-pounder. ๐Ÿฅพ
  17. Why did the mountain climber get lost in the woods? Because he took the wrong peak-nic basket.
  18. What do you call a mountain climber who is always arguing? A peak debater. ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธ
  19. Why did the mountain climber get a dog? Because he wanted a peak-a-poo. ๐Ÿถ
  20. What do you call a mountain climber who is always taking precautions? A peak-a-boo paranoid.

Denver’s Got Pun-tential

  1. Denver’s got pun-tential, it’s a Mile High City of laughter.
  2. What do you call a Denverite who loves puns? A pun-tential customer.
  3. Why did the Denver comedian get lost? Because he took a pun-derpass.
  4. What’s a Denverite’s favorite kind of humor? Punny business.
  5. How do you make a Denverite laugh? Tell them a pun-tastic joke.
  6. What do you call a Denverite who’s always cracking jokes? A pun-isher. ๐ŸŒถ๏ธ
  7. Why did the Denverite cross the road? To get to the pun-der side.
  8. What do you call a Denverite who’s always making puns? A pun-dit.
  9. Why did the Denver comedian get a sunburn? Because he was out pun-ishing the sun. โ˜€๏ธ
  10. What do you call a Denverite who’s always telling jokes? A pun-derful friend.
  11. Why did the Denverite get a job at a pun factory? Because they had pun-tential.
  12. What do you call a Denverite who’s always making puns? A pun-enthusiast.
  13. Why did the Denverite go to the doctor? Because they had a pun-ful day.
  14. What do you call a Denverite who’s always telling jokes? A pun-ny bunny. ๐Ÿฐ
  15. Why did the Denverite cross the road? To get to the other pun-ishment.
  16. What do you call a Denverite who’s always cracking jokes? A pun-ster.
  17. Why did the Denverite get a new car? Because their old one was pun-ished. ๐Ÿš—
  18. What do you call a Denverite who’s always making puns? A pun-star. ๐ŸŒŸ
  19. Why did the Denverite go to the library? To pun-derstand the world. ๐Ÿ“š
  20. What do you call a Denverite who’s always telling jokes? A pun-derful human being.

Punny Peaks and Valleys

  1. Why did the mountain climber get lost? Because he didn’t have a peak-nic basket to guide him. ๐Ÿ—ป
  2. What do you call a mountain that’s always on the same page? A mountain of evidence. โ›ฐ๐Ÿ“š
  3. Why did the hiker take a nap on the mountaintop? He wanted to get some peak-a-boo sleep. ๐Ÿ’คโ›ฐ
  4. What do you call a mountain that’s always late? A tardigrade. ๐Ÿข๐ŸŒโ›ฐ
  5. Why did the mountain climber get a sunburn? He forgot to use peak-a-boo sunscreen. โ˜€๏ธโ›ฐ
  6. What do you call a mountain that’s always arguing? A contentious peak. ๐Ÿ—ฃ๏ธโ›ฐ
  7. Why didn’t the mountain climber finish his dinner? Because he couldn’t stomach the peak. ๐Ÿคขโ›ฐ
  8. What do you call a mountain that’s always hungry? A mountain of appetites. ๐Ÿ”๐ŸŸโ›ฐ
  9. Why did the mountain climber get arrested? He was caught stealing peaks. ๐Ÿšจโ›ฐ
  10. What do you call a mountain that’s always crying? A weep peak. ๐Ÿฅบโ›ฐ
  11. Why did the mountain climber get lost in the fog? He couldn’t find his peak-ture. ๐ŸŒซ๏ธ๐Ÿ“ทโ›ฐ
  12. What do you call a mountain that’s always in a good mood? A happy peak. ๐Ÿ˜Šโ›ฐ
  13. Why didn’t the mountain climber have any money? Because he spent all his peaks. ๐Ÿ’ฐโ›ฐ
  14. What do you call a mountain that’s always sleeping? A snore peak. ๐Ÿ˜ดโ›ฐ
  15. Why did the mountain climber get a tattoo? He wanted to have a peak-ture memory. โ›ฐ๐Ÿ–ผ
  16. What do you call a mountain that’s always on the run? A fugitive peak. ๐Ÿƒโ€โ™‚๏ธโ›ฐ
  17. Why did the mountain climber get lost in the forest? He took the wrong peak at the fork in the road. ๐ŸŒฒโ›ฐ
  18. What do you call a mountain that’s always on the lookout? A vigilant peak. ๐Ÿ‘€โ›ฐ
  19. Why didn’t the mountain climber get a job as a photographer? Because he couldn’t focus on the peaks. ๐Ÿ“ธโ›ฐ
  20. What do you call a mountain that’s always in a bad mood? A grumpy peak. ๐Ÿ˜กโ›ฐ
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Un-Bear-able Denver Puns

  • Why did the bear get lost in Denver? Because he couldn’t find his beary-ings!
  • What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
  • Why did the bear cross the road? To get to the other “honey” side! ๐Ÿถ
  • What’s a bear’s favorite movie? Paw-triot Games!
  • What do you call a bear with a bad attitude? A grizzly bear!
  • Why did the bear join the circus? To become a bare-back rider!
  • What do you call a bear that’s always in trouble? A trouble-some bear! ๐Ÿถ
  • Why did the bear get a job at the lumberyard? To saw wood!
  • What do you call a bear that’s always late? A pro-crastin-bear!
  • Why did the bear cross the road? To get to the “honey” store!
  • What do you call a bear that’s good at math? A num-bear! ๐Ÿถ
  • Why did the bear get arrested? For paw-ssession of honey!
  • What do you call a bear that’s always out of breath? A puff-bear!
  • Why did the bear get lost in the woods? Because he couldn’t find his way “beary” back!
  • What do you call a bear that’s always angry? A “grizzly” old bear! ๐Ÿถ
  • Why did the bear get a job as a security guard? To protect the “honey” pot!
  • What do you call a bear that’s always getting lost? A “beary” confused bear!
  • Why did the bear join the army? To be a “paw-some” soldier!
  • What do you call a bear that’s always climbing trees? A climb-bear!

Larimer: The Epicenter of Denver Puns

  1. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear๐Ÿป.
  2. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
  3. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  4. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
  5. What do you call a snowman with a six pack? An abdominal snowman.
  6. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea๐ŸฆŒ!
  7. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
  8. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
  9. What do you call a bird that can fly backward? A swallow.
  10. What do you call a sheep with no legs? A carpet.
  11. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  12. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea๐ŸฆŒ!
  13. What do you call a boomerang that doesnโ€™t come back? A stick.
  14. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
  15. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
  16. What do you call a bird that can fly backward? A swallow.
  17. What do you call a sheep with no legs? A carpet.
  18. What do you call a kangaroo with no arms? A pouch potato.
  19. What do you call a lazy fish? A sea cucumber.
  20. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!

Puns from the Mile High Club

  1. What do you call a comedian who performs at 35,000 feet? A mile-high flyer.
  2. Why did the pilot get lost? Because he didn’t read the air-fare. โœˆ๏ธ
  3. What’s the best way to get a pilot’s attention? Plane-speak. โœˆ๏ธ
  4. Why did the plane crash? Because it ran out of aisle.
  5. What do you call a pilot who always gets the ladies? A wingman.
  6. What’s the difference between a good pilot and a bad pilot? One lands, and the other ones crash. ๐Ÿ’ฅ
  7. What do you call a pilot who’s always late? A slow flier. ๐Ÿฅฑ
  8. Why did the plane have to go to the doctor? It had a wing pain. ๐Ÿฉน
  9. What’s the best way to fly? With a co-pilot who can navigate the puns.
  10. Why did the pilot have to take a nap? Because he was flying all night. ๐Ÿ’ค
  11. What do you call a pilot who’s always getting into trouble? A tail-chaser.
  12. Why did the plane get a speeding ticket? Because it went too fast and furious. ๐Ÿš€
  13. What’s the difference between a plane and a bird? One flies, and the other just flaps.
  14. Why did the plane have to go to the mechanic? Because it had a leaky faucet. ๐Ÿ’ง
  15. What do you call a pilot who’s always getting lost? A flight risk.
  16. Why did the plane have to go on a diet? Because it was overweight. โš–๏ธ
  17. What’s the best way to make a plane go faster? Add some jet fuel to the coffee. โ˜•๏ธ
  18. Why did the plane get a sunburn? Because it was too close to the sun. โ˜€๏ธ
  19. What do you call a pilot who’s always getting into accidents? A crash test dummy. ๐Ÿ’ฅ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  20. Why did the plane have to wear a mask? Because it had a high altitude virus. ๐Ÿ˜ท

Golden, CO Punny Adventure

  1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  2. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
  3. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
  4. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
  5. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer.
  6. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
  7. What do you call a boomerang that doesnโ€™t come back? A stick.
  8. Why was the bee’s hair sticky? Because he used a honey-comb.
  9. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
  10. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! ๐Ÿ 
  11. What do you call a boomerang that doesnโ€™t come back? A stick. ๐ŸŽฏ
  12. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! ๐Ÿก
  13. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. ๐Ÿ‘€
  14. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one. โ›ณ
  15. What do you call a boomerang that doesnโ€™t come back? A stick. ๐Ÿฆ˜
  16. Why was the bee’s hair sticky? Because he used a honey-comb. ๐Ÿฏ
  17. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. ๐Ÿ„
  18. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! ๐ŸŸ
  19. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. ๐ŸฆŒ
  20. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one. ๐ŸŒ๏ธ
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Red Rocks Amphitheater: Echoing with Puns

  1. What do you call a rock concert at Red Rocks Amphitheater? A “stone” cold event!
  2. Why was the rockstar banned from Red Rocks? Because he was “rock”ing too hard!
  3. What sound do you hear when a band plays at Red Rocks? “Echoes!”
  4. What do you get when you cross a drummer with a Red Rocks Amphitheater? A “beat”echoeous!
  5. Why did the guitar player get lost at Red Rocks? Because he couldn’t find the “fret”work! ๐Ÿ˜„
  6. What do you call a musician who loves Red Rocks? An “amphitheater” enthusiast!
  7. Why was the sound system at Red Rocks so loud? Because it was “rock” solid!
  8. What do you get when you combine a Red Rocks concert with a campfire? A “smore” rockin’ experience!
  9. Why did the rock star cancel his concert at Red Rocks? Because he had a “stone” cold! ๐Ÿค’
  10. What do you call a rock concert at Red Rocks that’s really bad? A “rock” bottom performance!
  11. Why did the Red Rocks Amphitheater get a new roof? Because it was “rock” solid!
  12. What do you call a guitarist who always plays at Red Rocks? A “rock” star resident!
  13. Why did the singer get lost in Red Rocks? Because she couldn’t find the “note”worthy landmarks! ๐Ÿ™ƒ
  14. What do you call a rock concert at Red Rocks that’s super crowded? A “stone” packed event!
  15. Why did the band get kicked out of Red Rocks? Because they were playing too “rock”y!
  16. What do you call a musician who loves to play at Red Rocks? A “rock” climbing artist!
  17. Why was the Red Rocks Amphitheater so popular? Because it was a “rock” solid venue!
  18. What do you call a rock concert at Red Rocks that’s really loud? A “rocking” earsplitting event! ๐Ÿ‘‚
  19. Why did the Red Rocks Amphitheater get a new sound system? Because the old one was “rock”ing too hard!
  20. What do you call a rock concert at Red Rocks that’s really fun? A “rock”in’ good time!

Denver Art Museum: Pun-tastic Exhibits

  1. Why did the painting of the Mona Lisa smile? Because it was a pun-tastic exhibit!
  2. What do you call a sculpture made entirely of puns? A work of art.
  3. Why was the art curator so happy? Because he had a pun-derful collection!
  4. What’s the difference between a pun and a painting? One is art, and the other is a fart.
  5. Why did the artist get a paintbrush? To make his puns heard!
  6. What do you call a group of puns that are hung on a wall? A pun-orama!
  7. What do you call a painting that’s full of puns? A pun-masterpiece!
  8. What kind of art do you make when you tell a bad pun? A groan-worthy masterpiece.
  9. Why did the artist use a paint roller? Because he wanted to make his puns stick! ๐ŸŽจ
  10. What do you call a sculpture that’s made of puns? A pun-monument!
  11. What do you call a painting that’s so bad it’s funny? A pun-derstatement.
  12. Why did the art critic give the pun-tastic painting a bad review? Because it was too pun-ny! ๐Ÿ˜‚
  13. What do you call a painting that’s made entirely of puns? A pun-orama!
  14. What’s the difference between a good pun and a bad pun? A groaned atom! ๐Ÿ˜‚
  15. Why did the artist get a paintbrush? To make his puns heard!
  16. What do you call a sculpture that’s full of puns? A pun-o-rama!
  17. What kind of art do you make when you tell a bad pun? A groan-worthy masterpiece.
  18. Why did the art critic give the pun-tastic painting a bad review? Because it was too pun-ny!
  19. What do you call a painting that’s so bad it’s funny? A pun-derstatement.
  20. Why did the art critic give the pun-tastic painting a bad review? Because it was too pun-ny! ๐Ÿ˜‚

Union Station: Where Puns Get Tracked

  • Why did the train conductor leave his job at Union Station? Because he got tired of all the puns-ishment.
  • What do you call a train that’s always late? A de-train.
  • Why did the passenger get off the train at Union Station? Because he ran out of puns.
  • What do you call a train that’s always getting lost? A track-tor.
  • Why did the train engineer get a promotion? Because he was on the right track.
  • What do you call a train that’s always late and never on time? A punctuality challenged train.
  • Why did the train conductor get a new whistle? Because his old one was off-key.
  • What do you call a train that’s always breaking down? A derail-o.
  • Why did the train passenger cross the tracks? To get to the other station.
  • What do you call a train that’s always getting stuck? A loco-motive breakdown.
  • What do you call a train that’s always going in circles? A loco-motive loop.
  • Why did the train conductor get a new uniform? Because his old one was getting a little train-ed.
  • What do you call a train that’s always getting into accidents? A loco-motive disaster.
  • Why did the train passenger have to get off the train? Because he didn’t have a ticket.
  • What do you call a train that’s always breaking down? A loco-motive failure.
  • Why did the train conductor get a new job? Because he was tired of all the track-ing around.
  • What do you call a train that’s always going off the rails? A loco-motive escapade.
  • What do you call a train that’s always late? A loco-motive tardiness.
  • What do you call a train that’s always making noise? A loco-motive racket.

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