120+ Sword Puns That Will Cut You Up with Laughter!

Prepare yourself for a side-splitting adventure into the world of sword puns! Let’s embark on a quest for laughter, where we wield words as sharp as blades and aim to hit the mark with each witty line. From the noble ‘Knights of Puns’ to the ‘Legends of Puns,’ you’ll find an arsenal of puns that will make you laugh out loud.Whether you’re a seasoned pun-isher or just a curious adventurer, we’ve gathered the finest collection of sword-themed puns. They’re sharp, they’re witty, and they’ll leave you feeling like a true wordsmith. So, grab your imaginary sword, join the jousting for laughs, and let’s cut to the chase with some sword-tastic puns.Get ready to pierce the veil of humor with these puns. They’ll hit the mark and leave you with a smile that’s as bright as a shining blade. So, let’s sharpen our wits and delve into the world of sword puns, where laughter reigns supreme and humor strikes with precision!

Sharpening Your Wit: Sword-eriffic Puns

1. What do you call a knight who always makes puns? A pun-der
2. Why did the knight get lost in the forest? Because he didn’t have a map-quest
3. What do you call a sword that’s always sharp? A keen blade
4. What do you call a sword that’s always rusty? A dullard
5. What do you call a sword that’s always late? A procrastinator
6. What do you call a sword that’s always breaking? A brittle-iant
7. What do you call a sword that’s always bragging? A show-off
8. What do you call a sword that’s always fighting? A warrior
9. What do you call a sword that’s always in the way? A nuisance ⚔️
10. What do you call a sword that’s always lost? A wanderer 🗺️
11. What do you call a sword that’s always hungry? A foodie
12. What do you call a sword that’s always sleepy? A nightlight 🌙
13. What do you call a sword that’s always complaining? A whiner
14. What do you call a sword that’s always laughing? A joker 🃏
15. What do you call a sword that’s always crying? A weeper 💧
16. What do you call a sword that’s always singing? A crooner 🎶
17. What do you call a sword that’s always dancing? A twirler
18. What do you call a sword that’s always sleeping? A nap-ier
19. What do you call a sword that’s always reading? A bookworm 🐛
20. What do you call a sword that’s always playing video games? A gamer 🎮

Knights of Puns: The Sword-Sational Side of Comedy

1. Why did the knight get lost? Because he took a wrong turn at the joust-about.
2. What do you call a knight who’s always on time? Sir Punctual.
3. Why did the knight go to the doctor? Because he was feeling a little horse.
4. What do you call a lazy knight? Sir Procrastinate.
5. Why are knights so good at storytelling? Because they have a lot of tales to tell.
6. 🛡️ What do you call a knight who’s always cold? Sir Shivery. 🛡️
7. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other s-shield.
8. What do you get when you cross a knight with a frog? A princess in a moat.
9. Why did the knight get fired from his job? Because he kept getting into fights with the dragons.
10. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? Sir Misadventure.
11. Why are knights so good at chess? Because they’re always moving their horses.
12. What do you call a knight who’s always getting lost? Sir-cumnavigational.
13. Why did the knight quit his job? Because he kept getting into arguments with the dragons.
14. ⚔️ What do you call a knight who’s always late? Sir Reginald. ⚔️
15. Why didn’t the knight want to go to the doctor? Because he didn’t want to get his armor polished.
16. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? Sir Danger.
17. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other knight.
18. What do you call a knight who’s always getting lost? Sir Confused.
19. Why did the knight get a cold? Because he was a draft dodger.
20. Why did the knight get arrested? Because he was caught stealing armor.

A Cut Above: Puns that Slash and Stab

1. What do you call a joke that makes you laugh so hard you cut yourself? A knee-slapper.
2. Why did the surgeon get lost on the way to the hospital? Because he took a wrong turn and ended up in a dead end.
3. What do you call a doctor who makes house calls? A quack. 🔪🚑
4. What do you call a doctor who can’t keep a secret? A gossip. 💉👄
5. What do you call a doctor who always gets his patients confused? A mix-up. 💊😵
6. What do you call a doctor who’s always late? A procrastinator. 🤦‍♂️🕑
7. What do you call a doctor who’s always telling jokes? A pun-isher. 🔪😂
8. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving you bad news? A bearer of bad tiding. 📰💀
9. What do you call a doctor who’s always making you feel guilty? A guilt-tripper. 😈😰
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always trying to sell you something? A salesman. 💰⚕️
11. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving you advice? A know-it-all. 🙄📚
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always complaining? 🗣️🤷‍♀️

Jousting for Laughs: Sword-Wielding Wordplay

1. What do you call a knight who’s always late for battle? A joust procrastinator!
2. How do knights stay in shape? They do a lot of jousting!
3. What do you call a knight who’s always getting lost? Sir Cumference!
4. Why did the knight get a flu? Because he caught a chill! 🛡️
5. What do you call a knight who’s always complaining? A sir-ious whiner!
6. How do knights celebrate their birthdays? With a joust-about-age party!
7. What do you call a knight who’s always volunteering? A Sir-vant!
8. What do you call a knight who’s always borrowing money? A loan knight!
9. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other joust!
10. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? A thrill seeker!
11. What do you call a knight who’s always making jokes? A punny knight! ⚔️
12. What do you call a knight who’s always winning? A champ-ion!
13. What do you call a knight who’s always losing? A despair-er!
14. What do you call a knight who’s always training? A knight owl!
15. What do you call a knight who’s always eating? A knight at the round table!
16. What do you call a knight who’s always sleeping? A knighty night!
17. What do you call a knight who’s always getting hurt? A clumsy knight!
18. What do you call a knight who’s always chasing dragons? A knightmare!
19. What do you call a knight who’s always drinking mead? A knightcap! 🍻
20. What do you call a knight who’s always making puns? A knight-time comedian!

Legends of Puns: The Hilt-arious History of Sword Jokes

1. Why are knights so good at making puns? Because they have a sharp wit.
2. What do you call a knight with no sword? A dis-armed.
3. Why did the knight get lost in the forest? Because he took the wrong turn at the mead.
4. What do you call a sword that’s always late? A pro-crastinator. 🏰
5. Why did the knight put his sword in the fridge? To chill out.
6. What do you call a sword that’s always arguing? A contra-diction.
7. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other joust.
8. What do you call a sword that’s always wet? A damp-eer.
9. Why are swords so good at math? Because they can cut to the chase.
10. What do you call a sword that’s always happy? A glaive-ful.
11. Why did the knight go to the library? To check out some heavy metal. 📚
12. What do you call a sword that’s always in a good mood? A cheer-ful.
13. Why are swords so good at dancing? Because they have a cutting-edge style.
14. What do you call a sword that’s always trying to be a hero? A slash-er.
15. Why did the knight wear sunglasses? Because he was reflecting on the past. 😎
16. What do you call a sword that’s always making excuses? A lame-blade.
17. Why did the knight get lost in the grocery store? Because he couldn’t find the aisle of armor. 🛡️
18. What do you call a sword that’s always causing trouble? A rogue-blade.
19. Why did the knight always get detention? Because he was always getting into fights.
20. What do you call a sword that’s always out of style? A broad-sword.

Unveiling the Point: Puns that Hit the Mark

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
2. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
3. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 👻
4. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
5. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
6. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
7. What do you call a person who’s always taking selfies? A cell-fish.
8. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh! 👻
9. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything.
10. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
11. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
12. What do you call a kangaroo that can’t jump? A pouch potato. 👻
13. Why are colds bad criminals? They’re very hard to catch.
14. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
15. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
16. What do you call a person who’s always taking selfies? A cell-fish.
17. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
18. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
19. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
20. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!

Pierce the Veil of Humor: Sword-Related Puns for All

• Why did the knight put on his armor? To make sure he had a piercing personality!
• What do you call a knight who always wears a mask? A secret admirer 😎
• Why did the swordsman get lost? Because he couldn’t find his blade.
• What do you call a knight who is always late? A sword-dragger.
• Why did the shield break? Because it couldn’t handle the pressure!
• What do you call a knight who is always in trouble? A joust-about.
• Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other knightmare.
• What do you call a sword that’s always in trouble? A suspended weapon.
• Why did the sword get a cold? Because it was exposed to a draftsman.
• What do you call a knight who is always breaking things? A careless cleaver.
• Why did the sword get lost? Because it couldn’t find its scarecrow!
• What do you call a knight who always gets into fights? A combat catalyst.
• Why did the knight get a haircut? Because he was getting a bit un-knightly.
• What do you call a knight who is always making mistakes? A rusty swordsman.
• Why did the sword get a sunburn? Because it was out in the heat too long.
• What do you call a knight who is always getting lost? A wandering warrior.
• Why did the knight get a tattoo? Because he wanted to make a point.
• What do you call a knight who is always in a bad mood? A grumpy groaner.
• Why did the sword get a divorce? Because it was always getting into quarrels.
• What do you call a knight who is always trying to improve? A sharpening swordsman.

Sword-play on Words: A Duel of Wits

1. I’m great at fencing, but not so good at sword-play on words.
2. What do you call a knight who’s always late? Sir Procrastinator.
3. What do you call a sword that’s always getting lost? A scabbard-case.
4. Why did the knight get lost in the forest? Because he took a wrong turn at the wooden path.
5. What do you call a knight who’s always bragging? A Sir-en. ⚔️
6. What do you call a sword that’s always telling jokes? A pun-isher.
7. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other joust.
8. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? A Sir-get-in-trouble-a-lot.
9. Why did the knight get a cold? Because he left his armor open.
10. What do you call a knight who’s always singing? A Sir-enade.
11. What do you call a knight who’s always hungry? A Sir-loin.
12. Why did the knight lose his job? Because he was too cut-throat.
13. What do you call a knight who’s always late for a fight? A Sir-looser. ⚔️
14. Why did the knight get a library card? To checkout some medieval novels.
15. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into fights? A Sir-ious problem.
16. Why did the knight get a haircut? Because he was too hairy-knight.
17. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? A Sir-trouble-maker.
18. Why did the knight get a dog? Because he wanted a Sir-ius companion. ⚔️
19. What do you call a knight who’s always losing his keys? A Sir-locksmith.
20. Why did the knight get lost in the forest? Because he took a wrong turn at the knight-fall.

Forging Laughter: The Edge-ucational Value of Sword-Based Puns

• Why did the knight make a terrible blacksmith? Because he couldn’t forge-t about his mistakes.
• What do you call a sword that’s always late? A pro-crastinator!
• Why did the samurai get lost? Because he took a sword turn.
• What do you get when you cross a knight with a librarian? A book-knight.
• What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? A sir-geant.
• Why couldn’t the knight sleep? Because he was sword-tossing and turning. 🗡️
• What do you get when you cross a knight with a math professor? A derivative.
• What do you call a knight who’s always on the lookout? A vigilance.
• Why did the knight join the army? To defend his ideals.
• What do you call a knight who’s always making puns? A sword-punsman.
• Why did the knight attack the treasure chest? Because it was full of loot.
• What do you call a knight who’s always getting lost? A dis-oriented.
• Why did the knight get a haircut? Because he wanted to sharpen his edges.
• What do you call a knight who’s always cooking? A sir-loin master.
• Why did the knight get a job at the zoo? To feed the lions.
• What do you call a knight who’s always on the go? A knight in transit. ⚔️
• Why did the knight take up gardening? Because he wanted to grow some chivalrous flowers.
• What do you call a knight who’s always getting into fights? A sir-ious pain in the neck.
• Why did the knight wear a helmet? To protect his head from puns.

A Blade of Humor: Puns that Cut to the Chase

1. What do you call a ninja who always makes bad jokes? A punisher.
2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
3. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
4. 🔪 I’m blade-ing your time.
5. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
6. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
7. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
8. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea. 👀
9. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
10. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
11. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
12. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
13. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
14. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🐄
15. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
16. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
17. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
18. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🐄
19. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
20. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.

Sharpen Your Wit: Sword-tastic Puns for All

1. What do you call a knight who can’t find his socks? Sir Socks-less
2. Why are knights so good at geometry? Because they can always find the circumference of a circle ⚔️
3. What do you get when you cross a knight and a bee? A honeycomb-at! 🍯
4. What do you call a knight who’s always losing his keys? Sir Locks-a-lot 🔑
5. Why did the knight get lost in the woods? Because he didn’t have a map-quest!
6. What do you call a knight who fights using a microphone? A mic-night
7. Why are knights such good dancers? Because they’re always ready to two-step! 💃
8. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? Sir Mix-a-lot ⚠️
9. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other castle! 🏰
10. What do you call a knight who’s always getting lost? Sir-round-n-round 🌀
11. Why are knights such good storytellers? Because they always have a joust-for-fun!
12. What do you call a knight who’s always changing his mind? Sir Flip-flop 🔄
13. Why did the knight get a flu shot? Because he wanted to be im-pew-ned 💉🛡️
14. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into fights? Sir Scuffle-lot ⚔️
15. Why are knights such good singers? Because they’re always in tune with their armor 🎵
16. What do you call a knight who’s always wearing a helmet? Sir Head-protection 🪖
17. Why are knights such good cooks? Because they always know how to make a stew-dio! 🍳
18. What do you call a knight who’s always getting injured? Sir-geon 🩹
19. Why are knights such good golfers? Because they always know how to hit the green! ⛳️
20. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into duels? Sir-vivor! 🤺

A Quiver of Puns: Sword-Inspired Jokes to Hit the Mark

• What do you call a knight who always gets lost? A knight errant.
• Why did the swordsman get a new coat of paint? Because he wanted to repaint his steel.
• What do you call a sword that’s always happy? A smile-edge.
• Why did the king ban jousting? Because he didn’t want any more knights unhorsing around.
• What do you call a sword that’s always bragging? A broad-sword.
• Why did the swordsman get a job at the bakery? Because he was a dough-ble blade.
• What do you call a sword that’s always getting into trouble? A scabbard-head.
• Why did the knight get a new shield? Because his old one was getting too rusty. 🛡️
• What do you call a sword that’s always late? A procrastin-blade.
• Why did the swordsman take up knitting? Because he wanted to try something sharp.
• What do you call a sword that’s always getting its wires crossed? A confused-blade.
• Why did the knight get a new sword? Because he wanted to cut to the chase.
• What do you call a sword that’s always in a hurry? A rush-blade.
• Why did the swordsman go to the library? Because he wanted to read a good knight’s tale. 📚
• What do you call a sword that’s always getting into fights? A duel-ling blade.
• Why did the knight get a new helmet? Because his old one was too knight-mareish.
• What do you call a sword that’s always dropping things? A fumble-blade.
• Why did the swordsman get a new horse? Because his old one was too slow. 🐎
• What do you call a sword that’s always getting lost? A lost-blade.

Sword-cery: The Mysterious Art of Pun-ishment

1. Why were the knights so good at making puns? Because they had a sharp wit!
2. What do you call a sword that’s always getting lost? A miss-calibur! 🛡️
3. Why did the knight get lost in the castle? Because he couldn’t find the right drawbridge!
4. What do you call a sword that’s always in trouble? A rebel blade!
5. Why did the sword get a tattoo? To show off its sharp edge!
6. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into fights? A duel-icious dude!
7. Why didn’t the knight use the escalator? Because he preferred the knight lift!
8. What do you call a knight who’s always late? A tardy tyrant! 🏰
9. Why did the sword break up with the shield? Because it couldn’t handle the clash!
10. What do you call a knight who’s always thirsty? A thirsty knight! 💦
11. Why did the knight cross the road? To get to the other castle!
12. What do you call a knight who’s always cold? A chilly chivalrous!
13. Why did the sword get a haircut? To show off its sharp style!
14. What do you call a knight who’s always getting lost? A wandering warrior!
15. Why didn’t the knight go to the dentist? Because he was afraid of the tooth fairy! 😂
16. What do you call a knight who’s always getting into trouble? A jousting jackass!
17. Why did the sword get a manicure? To file its sharp claws!
18. What do you call a knight who’s always making puns? A punisher!
19. Why did the sword get a tattoo? To show off its ink-credible skills!
20. What do you call a knight who’s always breaking things? A smasher of shields! 🛡️

The Cut of It: Puns that Will Make You Sword-smile

1. Why did the knight get lost? Because he was too busy knight-navigating.
2. What do you call a sword that can’t cut? A dull-as-a-butter-knife sword.
3. Why did the samurai go to the doctor? He had a katana headache.
4. What do you call a sword that’s always late? A pro-crastinate-or.
5. Why did the scabbard get angry? Because it was always being taken for granted.
6. What do you call a sword that loves to tell jokes? A cut-up.
7. Why did the sword get fired? Because it kept cutting corners.
8. What do you call a sword that’s always in a good mood? An optimist-blade.
9. Why did the blacksmith have to go to the hospital? He accidentally hammered his thumb.
10. What do you call a sword that’s always getting into trouble? A delinquent-blade. ⚡
11. Why did the swordsman get a new pair of pants? Because his old ones were too short.
12. What do you call a sword that’s always trying to start fights? A belli-cowgernt sword.
13. Why did the fencing instructor get a divorce? Because his wife said he was too sharp-tongued.
14. What do you call a sword that’s always lost? A wandering-blade.
15. Why did the swordsman get a pet parrot? Because he wanted a bird-eye view of the battlefield.
16. What do you call a sword that’s always making mistakes? A fumble-blade.
17. Why did the blacksmith get a new anvil? Because his old one was too heavy.
18. What do you call a sword that’s always borrowing money? A loan-sword.
19. Why did the sword get a new sheath? Because it was tired of being blunt.
20. What do you call a sword that’s always telling stories? A yarn-blade. 🗡️