123 Holy Cow Jokes That’ll Make You Moooove With Laughter!

Are you ready to dive into the hilarious world of drug puns? Get ready to roll on the floor with laughter as I serve you a potent dose of wordplay and humor. These witty one-liners and clever jokes will have you hooked from the start.Knock, knock! Who’s there? Alto. Alto who? I’m feeling a little hoarse, can I get you some cough drops?Now, let’s get high on puns! What do you call a drug that makes you see the future? A prescription for glasses! Hold on tight, because the puns are just getting started. Why did the drug dealer get lost? Because he was high on his own supply!But wait, there’s more! What do you call a drug that makes you sleepy? A downer. And what about a drug that makes you happy? A smile pill! Don’t forget the drug that makes you forget things – a memory loss tablet.As we venture deeper into the realm of puns, we encounter a drug that makes you hallucinate – a reality warp. Hold on to your seats, because there’s a drug that makes you fly – a sky-high potion!But the puns don’t stop there. What do you call a drug that makes you feel invincible? A superhero serum. And how about a drug that makes you invisible? A vanishing potion. The puns just keep on coming!Are you ready for the fountain of youth? What do you call a drug that makes you immortal? A fountain of youth. And what about a drug that makes you younger? A time turner.But wait, there’s more! What do you call a drug that makes you smarter? A brain booster. And how about a drug that makes you look younger? A face-lift potion.So, there you have it – the ultimate collection of drug puns that will keep you entertained for hours on end. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, and these puns are a potent dose of it. Enjoy!

Knock, Knock. Who’s There? Alto. Alto Who? I’m feeling a little hoarse, can I get you some cough drops?

1. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Tank. Tank you! I’m so glad you could make it!
2. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Snow. Snow who? I’m all covered up! 🥶
3. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in, it’s cold out here!
4. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Nobel. Nobel who? Nobel… that’s why I knocked!
5. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Figs. Figs who? Figs the doorbell, it’s not working!
6. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Bee. Bee who? Bee careful, I’m opening the door!
7. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up and open the door, it’s freezing out here!
8. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Norma Lee. Norma Lee who? Norma Lee sure you’re happy to see me!
9. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Figs. Figs who? Figs the door, I’m not breaking it!
10. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You’re welcome! 😄
11. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Utah. Utah who? You tah you’re funny, but I don’t!
12. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? I smell. I smell who? You smell funny! 😆
13. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Leg. Leg who? Leggo my Eggo!
14. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Two. Two who? Two can play at that game!
15. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca my bags, we’re leaving!
16. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Don’t cry, it’s just me!
17. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Beans. Beans who? Beans the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot! 💨
18. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Honeydew. Honeydew who? Honeydew you know how much I love puns?
19. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Tank you. Tank you who? You’re welcome! 😊
20. Knock, Knock! Who’s there? Dwayne. Dwayne who? Dwayne the bathtub, I’m all out of soap!

What do you call a drug that makes you see the future? A prescription for glasses!

1. What do you call a drug that makes you see the future? A prescription for glasses! 👓
2. I’m looking for a drug that will help me see the future. Any suggestions? 🔮
3. What do you call a doctor who specializes in future medicine? An optometrist! 👁️‍🗨️
4. What kind of doctor do you go to if you want to see the future? An eye doctor! 👀
5. What do you call a person who can see the future? A fortune teller, but in this case, a “prescription teller”! 🃏
6. What’s the best way to see the future? With your eyes open! 😆
7. I’m so good at seeing the future, I’m practically a psychic! 🔮
8. What do you call a blind person who can see the future? A fortune teller! 🦮
9. What do you call a time traveler who sells drugs? A prescription for the future! 💊
10. What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a fortune teller? One deals in drugs, the other deals in future drugs! 🔮💊
11. What do you call a psychic who’s also a doctor? A prescription for the future! 🔮⚕️
12. What do you call a doctor who deals in future drugs? A prescription for the future! 💊⚕️
13. What do you call a drug that makes you live forever? A prescription for longevity! 长生不老药
14. What’s the best way to predict the future? By creating it yourself! 🛠️
15. What do you call a person who can predict the future? A fortune teller 🔮
16. What’s the most important thing to remember about the future? It’s always changing! ⌛
17. What do you call a doctor who can see the future? A future-ist! 🔮⚕️
18. What do you call a person who’s always right? A future-knower! 💡
19. What’s the best way to see the future? With your imagination! 💭
20. What do you call a person who’s always looking for the future? A future-seeker! 🔭

Why did the drug dealer get lost? Because he was high on his own supply!

1. Why did the drug dealer get lost? Because he was high on his own supply! 🌿💨
2. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always getting lost? A lost cause.
3. Why did the drug dealer’s car break down? Because he was driving under the influence. 🚗💨
4. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always in trouble with the law? A reefer madness. 🚨🌿
5. Why did the drug dealer open a restaurant? Because he wanted to cook up some good dope. 👨‍🍳🌿
6. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always getting caught? A frequent flyer. ✈️🌿
7. Why did the drug dealer go to the doctor? Because he was feeling a little down. 💊🌿
8. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always smiling? A happy high-er. 😊🌿
9. Why did the drug dealer cross the road? To get to the other side and sell some weed. 🌿🚶
10. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always late? A time waster. ⌛🌿
11. Why did the drug dealer take up gardening? Because he wanted to grow his own stash. 🌱🌿
12. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always on the run? A fugitive. 🏃🌿
13. Why did the drug dealer get a library card? Because he wanted to check out some dope books. 📚🌿
14. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always in a good mood? A happy high-er. 😀🌿
15. Why did the drug dealer go to the bank? To get some green. 💵🌿
16. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always out of stock? A sell-out. ❌🌿
17. Why did the drug dealer open a bakery? Because he wanted to make some dough. 💰🌿
18. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always getting ripped off? A sucker. 💸🌿
19. Why did the drug dealer become a pilot? Because he wanted to fly high. ✈️🌿
20. What do you call a drug dealer who’s always getting arrested? A habitual offender. 🚔🌿

What do you call a drug that makes you sleepy? A downer.

1. What do you call a drug that makes you sleepy? A downer.. 🤣
2. What do you call a drug that makes you see things? A hallucinator.😆
3. What do you call a drug that makes you feel good? A feelgooder. 😎
4. What do you call a drug that makes you think clearly? A clear thinker.🤔
5. What do you call a drug that makes you feel relaxed? A relaxer.😌
6. What do you call a drug that makes you lose weight? A slimmer. 👙👗👠
7. What do you call a drug that makes you gain weight? A fattener. 🍔🍟🍕
8. What do you call a drug that makes you strong? A strengthener. 💪🏋️‍♂️
9. What do you call a drug that makes you faster? A speedster. 🏎️💨
10. What do you call a drug that makes you smarter? An intelligence enhancer. 🧠💡

What do you call a drug that makes you happy? A smile pill.

• What do you call a drug that makes you happy? A smile pill. 😁
• If life gives you lemons, make a joke! 🍋
• I’m not addicted to puns, I just find them whey too Gouda! 🧀
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 👀🐠
• Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peel-ing well! 🍌🤕
• How do trees get on the internet? They log in! 🌲💻
• Why was the math book feeling sad? Because it had too many problems! 📘😭
• What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta! 🍝
• Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! 🌾🏆
• What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe! 🐝🤔
• Why are colds bad criminals? They’re very hard to catch! 😷🤧
• What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick! 🪃
• Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! ⛳️🏌️‍♂️
• What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick! 🪃
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘🥔
• What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time! ⌚️⏳
• Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired! 🚲😴
• What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🐄🍖
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 👀🐠

What do you call a drug that makes you forget things? A memory loss tablet.

1. Why did the patient refuse to take his memory loss medication? Because he didn’t want to forget his daily dose!
2. What do you call a fish that loses its memory every five seconds? Dory
3. What do you call a tree that can’t remember its past? A deciduous tree
4. Why did the person with memory loss get lost in the grocery store? Because they couldn’t remember where the checkout line was
5. What do you call a dinosaur with a bad memory? A brontosaurus
6. What do you call a group of people who can’t remember anything? A collective amnesia
7. What do you call a memory that’s always forgotten? A slip of the mind
8. What do you call a phone that can’t remember its numbers? A forgetful phone
9. What do you call a computer that can’t remember its files? A lost memory
10. What do you call a person who can’t remember their name? Anonymous
11. What do you call a clock that can’t remember the time? A wristwatch with a short memory
12. What do you call a book that can’t remember its pages? A blank book
13. What do you call a song that can’t remember its lyrics? A forgotten tune
14. What do you call a painting that can’t remember its colors? A faded masterpiece
15. What do you call a movie that can’t remember its plot? A forgotten film
16. What do you call a TV show that can’t remember its characters? A lost memory
17. What do you call a video game that can’t remember its levels? A forgotten quest
18. What do you call a dream that can’t remember its story? A forgotten nightmare
19. What do you call a wish that can’t remember its desire? A lost longing
20. What do you call a hope that can’t remember its promise? A shattered dream

What do you call a drug that makes you hallucinate? A reality warp.

1. What do you call a reality that gets twisted? A reality warp.
2. Why did the drug dealer get lost? Because he took a reality warp.
3. What do you call a drug that makes you see things that aren’t there? A reality warp.
4. What do you call a drug that makes you think differently? A reality warp.
5. What do you call a drug that makes you feel like you’re in a different world? A reality warp.
6. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in a new way? A reality warp.
7. What do you call a drug that makes you forget everything? A reality warp.
8. What do you call a drug that makes you see the future? A reality warp.
9. What do you call a drug that makes you see the past? A reality warp.
10. What do you call a drug that makes you see the present? A reality warp.
11. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world upside down? A reality warp.
12. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in slow motion? A reality warp.
13. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in fast motion? A reality warp.
14. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in black and white? A reality warp.
15. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in color? A reality warp.
16. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in 3D? A reality warp.
17. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in 4D? A reality warp.
18. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in 5D? A reality warp.
19. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in 6D? A reality warp.
20. What do you call a drug that makes you see the world in 7D? A reality warp.

What do you call a drug that makes you fly? A sky high potion.

1. What do you call a drug that makes you talk to animals? A vet-nary concoction.
2. What do you call a drug that makes you see double? A 2-D potion.
3. What do you call a drug that makes you forget everything? A memory loss potion.
4. What do you call a drug that makes you laugh uncontrollably? A giggle juice.
5. What do you call a drug that makes you feel invincible? A superhero serum.
6. What do you call a drug that makes you invisible? A sneaky potion.
7. What do you call a drug that makes you turn into a frog? A toadally awesome potion. 🐸
8. What do you call a drug that makes you speak in tongues? A polyglot potion.
9. What do you call a drug that makes you dance like a pro? A boogie potion.
10. What do you call a drug that makes you feel like you’re flying? A sky-high potion. 🚀
11. What do you call a drug that makes you sing like a bird? A nightingale potion.
12. What do you call a drug that makes you run faster than a cheetah? A cheetah-speed potion.
13. What do you call a drug that makes you glow in the dark? A light-up potion. ✨
14. What do you call a drug that makes you immune to pain? An ouch-proof potion.
15. What do you call a drug that makes you age backwards? A youth potion.
16. What do you call a drug that makes you see the future? A foresight potion.
17. What do you call a drug that makes you speak in foreign languages? A language-learning potion.
18. What do you call a drug that makes you smarter than Einstein? A genius potion.
19. What do you call a drug that makes you stronger than a superhero? A superhuman potion. 🦸‍♂️
20. What do you call a drug that makes you immune to all diseases? An elixir of life.

What do you call a drug that makes you feel invincible? A superhero serum.

1. What do you call a broken guitar? A fret-ful situation.
2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! 🍅
3. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman. 🧊
4. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
5. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! 🏌️‍♂️
6. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato. 🦘
7. Why couldn’t the bicycle smile? Because it was two tired! 🚲
8. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! (Again, but with the emoji) 🐟
9. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well! 🍌
10. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick. 🪃
11. Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing! 🍅
12. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🐄
13. Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake! 🍰
14. What do you call a tree that can’t stop talking? A chatterbox! 🌳
15. Why did the computer get a cold? It had a virus! 💻
16. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta! 🍝
17. Why did the math book look so sad? Because it was full of problems! 📚
18. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time! ⌚️
19. Why did the traffic light turn red? It was feeling a little shy! 🚦
20. What do you call a lazy egg? A couch potato! 🥚

What do you call a drug that makes you invisible? A vanishing potion.

• A magician stole all my pencils. That was a great trick. ✏️
• I accidentally put all my money in my dictionary. It was a costly mistake. 📖💰
• What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved. 🌊👋
• Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! 🏌️‍♂️👖
• I’ve decided to sell my vacuum cleaner… it was just gathering dust. 🧹💨
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟👀
• What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick. 🦘❎
• Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its neck! 💻💆‍♂️
• I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage. I lost my case. ✈️💼⚖️
• What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🐄🍗
• I’m an archaeologist. My career is in ruins. 🗿🔧
• What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in the pool? Bob! 🏊‍♂️🏊‍♀️
• Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired! 🚲💤
• I used to hate facial hair… but then it grew on me. 🧔‍♂️🌱
• I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something. 🧗‍♂️🤔
• What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta! 🍝🤷‍♂️
• Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing! 🍅🥗💦
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟👀
• What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea! 🦌👀🤔

What do you call a drug that makes you immortal? A fountain of youth.

1. What do you call a drug that makes you immortal? A fountain of youth.
2. What do you call a drug that makes you fly? A plane ticket.
3. What do you call a drug that makes you happy? A good joke.
4. What do you call a drug that makes you sleepy? A sleeping pill.
5. What do you call a drug that makes you smarter? A book.
6. What do you call a drug that makes you stronger? A gym membership.
7. What do you call a drug that makes you rich? A financial advisor.
8. What do you call a drug that makes you beautiful? A mirror.
9. What do you call a drug that makes you invisible? A chameleon.
10. What do you call a drug that makes you immortal? A coffin.
11. What do you call a drug that makes you forgetful? A goldfish. 🐠
12. What do you call a drug that makes you invisible? A glass of water. 💧
13. What do you call a drug that makes you immortal? A clock.
14. What do you call a drug that makes you fly? A plane ticket. ✈️
15. What do you call a drug that makes you happy? A hug. 🤗
16. What do you call a drug that makes you sleepy? A pillow. 😴
17. What do you call a drug that makes you smarter? A library. 📚
18. What do you call a drug that makes you stronger? A workout routine. 💪
19. What do you call a drug that makes you rich? A lottery ticket. 💰
20. What do you call a drug that makes you invisible? A stealth bomber.

What do you call a drug that makes you younger? A time turner.

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
2. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
3. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!
4. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
5. What do you call a tree that can’t stop talking? A chatterbox!
6. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time!
7. What do you call a kangaroo that can’t jump? A pouch potato! 🦘
8. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘
9. What do you call a kangaroo that loves to party? A roo-raver! 🦘
10. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
11. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
12. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
13. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
14. What do you call a kangaroo that can’t jump? A pouch potato! 🦘
15. What do you call a tree that can’t stop talking? A chatterbox!
16. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time!
17. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!
18. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
19. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
20. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘

What do you call a drug that makes you smarter? A brain booster.

1. What do you call a student who always gets high grades? A brain teaser!
2. Why did the neuron go to the doctor? It was feeling a little cell-fish!
3. What do you call a smart person who’s always on the go? A brain train!
4. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
5. What’s the difference between a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac with diarrhea? He doesn’t know what’s going on, he doesn’t care why, he can’t sleep, and he has the runs!! 💡
6. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
7. Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its back!
8. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
10. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
11. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
12. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
13. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
14. What do you call a person who’s afraid of Santa Claus? Claus-trophobic!
15. What do you call a lazy egg? A couch potato!
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? 🐟 Fsh!
17. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick!
18. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
19. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
20. What do you call a fish with no eyes? 🐟 Fsh!

What do you call a drug that makes you look younger? A face-lift potion.

1. What do you call a vaccine that makes you look younger? A beauty shot.
2. What do you call a moisturizer that reverses aging? A time-turner cream.
3. What do you call a serum that makes your skin glow? A radiant potion.
4. What do you call a lotion that makes you look like a baby? A youth enhancer.
5. What do you call a mask that makes your wrinkles disappear? A wrinkle eraser.
6. What do you call a face cream that makes you look like a 20-year-old? A reverse-aging elixir 🥺.
7. What do you call a peel that makes your skin look brand new? A skin-renewal potion.
8. What do you call a scrub that makes your skin soft and smooth? A magic exfoliator.
9. What do you call a serum that makes your hair thick and luscious? A hair-growth potion.
10. What do you call a nail polish that makes your nails strong and shiny? A nail-strengthening potion.
11. What do you call a lipstick that makes your lips look plump and kissable? A lip-plumping potion.
12. What do you call a foundation that makes your skin look flawless? A complexion corrector potion.
13. What do you call an eye cream that makes your dark circles disappear? A dark-circle-diminishing potion.
14. What do you call a perfume that makes you irresistible to the opposite sex? A love potion 😍.
15. What do you call a hairspray that makes your hair defy gravity? A gravity-defying potion.
16. What do you call a body wash that makes your skin feel like silk? A silk-touch potion.
17. What do you call a shampoo that makes your hair smell like candy? A candy-scented potion.
18. What do you call a conditioner that makes your hair soft and manageable? A hair-taming potion.
19. What do you call a shaving cream that makes your legs smooth and sexy? A leg-smoothing potion.
20. What do you call a deodorant that keeps you fresh and confident all day? A confidence-boosting potion.