140+ Grandma Puns That’ll Make You Wheeze With Laughter!

Prepare yourself for a side-splitting adventure into the realm of grandmothers and their unbeatable puns! In this ultimate guide, we’ll embark on a hilarious journey through the minds of these witty matriarchs, uncovering their arsenal of groan-worthy jokes that will make you laugh out loud.From classic one-liners to knee-slapping puns, we’ve gathered the best of the best, so get ready to tickle your funny bone. We’ll delve into the wisdom of Nana-isms, where grandmas dish out the best advice with a side of humor. And let’s not forget the Grand Jury of Puns, where a panel of grandmas judge the classics, ensuring only the crème de la crème makes the cut.Whether you’re looking for a grandma joke to break the ice or a chuckle to brighten your day, this comprehensive collection has something for everyone. Join us as we celebrate the incredible sense of humor of grandmas, who prove that laughter truly is the best wrinkle cream.

Grandma’s Got Jokes: The Ultimate Collection of Hilarious Puns

1. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling bad jokes? A pun-isher!
2. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other pun-chline!
3. What do you call a grandma who’s always making you laugh? A joke-a-nana! 👵
4. Why did the grandma throw butter? She wanted to see a butter-fly! 🧈
5. What do you call a grandma who’s always got a smile on her face? A pun-enthusiast!
6. Why did the grandma put on her glasses? To see the “eye-conic” punchlines!
7. What do you call a grandma who’s always losing her keys? A pun-dertaker!
8. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other side of the joke! 🚗
9. What do you call a grandma who’s always the life of the party? A pun-isher! 🎉
10. Why did the grandma eat her homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake! 🎂
11. What do you call a grandma who’s always on the go? A pun-derful adventurer! 🗺️
12. Why did the grandma get lost in the woods? Because she didn’t have a pun-derful sense of direction! 🌳
13. What do you call a grandma who’s always got a joke up her sleeve? A pun-chant granny! 👵
14. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other side of the joke, of course! 🚗
15. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling bad jokes? A pun-ishment! 🚫
16. Why did the grandma get a speeding ticket? Because she was driving too pun-fast! 🚨
17. What do you call a grandma who’s always got a smile on her face? A pun-lightful soul! 😊
18. Why did the grandma buy a new car? Because she was tired of her old pun-mobile! 🚘
19. What do you call a grandma who’s always giving out advice? A pun-derful counselor! 💁‍♀️
20. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other side of the joke, obviously! 🛣️

Pun-derful Grandmas: Jokes That Will Make Your Nana Groan

1. What do you call a grandma who loves to quilt? A nana-grammer!
2. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other scone. 👵
3. What do you call a grandma who’s always cold? A Frosty Nana. 👵❄️
4. Why did the grandpa hide behind the tree? Because he wanted to be a pop-ular! 👴🌲
5. What do you call a grandma who’s a great cook? A supreme Nana! 👵👩‍🍳
6. Why did the grandma go to the bank? To get her dough! 👵💰
7. What do you call a grandma who loves to sing? A karaoke Nana! 👵🎤
8. Why did the grandma get a speeding ticket? Because she was driving in the granny lane! 🚔👵
9. What do you call a grandma who’s always on the go? A jet-setting Nana! ✈👵
10. Why did the grandma get lost in the forest? Because she couldn’t find her way out of the thicket. 👵🌲
11. What do you call a grandma who’s a fashionista? A stylish Nana! 👗👵
12. Why did the grandma cross the road twice? Because she forgot to get her purse the first time! 👜👵
13. What do you call a grandma who’s a great gardener? A green-thumb Nana! 👵🌱
14. Why did the grandma get a tattoo? Because she wanted to be inkedredible! 👵💉
15. What do you call a grandma who’s a rockstar? A nana-nana-boo-boo! 👵🎸
16. Why did the grandma get a new car? Because she wanted to drive her grandchildren in style! 🚗👵
17. What do you call a grandma who’s always complaining? A whiny Nana! 👵🗣️
18. Why did the grandma go to the library? To check out some old-fashioned books! 📚👵
19. What do you call a grandma who’s a master of disguise? A Nana-setta! 👵🎭
20. Why did the grandma get a new haircut? Because she wanted to look sharp! ✂️👵

Why Did Grandma Cross the Road? To Get to the Punchline!

• Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
• What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
• Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired! 🚲
• What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
• Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! ⛳️
• What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman! ⛄️
• Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake! 🍰
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘
• Why did the math book look so sad? Because it was full of problems! 🤦‍♂️
• What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe. 🐝
• Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its back! 💻
• What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick. 📣
• Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! 🏌️‍♂️
• What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman! ❄️
• Why did the math book look so sad? Because it was full of problems! 📚
• What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🥔
• Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake! 📝
• What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe. 🤔

Nana-isms: Wisecracks and Quips from Your Dearest Grandma

1. Why did the Nana cross the road? To show the chicken who’s boss! 👵🐔
2. What do you call a Nana who’s always making jokes? A pun-isher. 😅
3. Why couldn’t the Nana fix her computer? Because she didn’t have the app-titude! 💻🤷‍♀️
4. What do you call a Nana’s favorite fruit? A pear-fect dish! 🍐👵
5. What do you call a Nana who’s always getting lost? A wander-Nana! 🗺️👵
6. Why did the Nana get a tattoo? Because she wanted to show off her “sage” advice! 👵🌿
7. What do you call a Nana who’s always making noise? A chatter-Nana! 🗣️👵
8. Why did the Nana get a new broom? Because she wanted to sweep away her cobwebs! 🧹👵
9. What do you call a Nana who’s always forgetting things? A scatter-Nana! 🤦‍♀️👵
10. Why did the Nana get a new hearing aid? Because she was starting to lose her “earnestness”! 👂👵
11. What do you call a Nana who’s always giving advice? A wise-acre! 👵💡
12. Why did the Nana go to the doctor? Because she was feeling a little “off her rocker!” 👵🩺
13. What do you call a Nana who’s always in a good mood? A happy-Nana! 😄👵
14. Why did the Nana get a new car? Because she wanted to drive her grandkids around “in style”! 👵🚗
15. What do you call a Nana who’s always getting into trouble? A rebel-Nana! 👵😈
16. Why did the Nana get a new pet parrot? Because she wanted someone to talk to who could understand her “squawks”! 🐦👵
17. What do you call a Nana who’s always cooking? A master-chef-Nana! 👩‍🍳👵
18. Why did the Nana get a new rocking chair? Because she wanted to rock her grandkids to sleep with her “sweet serenades”! 👵🎶
19. What do you call a Nana who’s always gardening? A green thumb-Nana! 🌱👵
20. Why did the Nana get a new cellphone? Because she wanted to stay connected with her grandkids “at all times”! 📱👵

Grandmas: The Original Stand-Up Comedians

1. Grandmas: The original stand-up comedians, with jokes that have been passed down for generations.
2. Why are grandmas so good at telling jokes? Because they’ve got a lot of “grand” experiences to draw from! 👵🏻
3. What do you call a grandma who’s always making people laugh? A “stand-up grandparent!” 🤣
4. Why do grandmas love puns? Because they’re the “pun-iest” people you know!
5. What’s a grandma’s favorite type of stand-up comedy? “One-liners” from her grandkids!
6. Why did the grandma go to the doctor? Because she was feeling “under the weather!” 🤒
7. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting into trouble? A “grand-mischief-maker!”
8. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other “side” of her joke!
9. What’s the difference between a grandma and a stand-up comedian? One wears slippers, the other wears a microphone! 🎤
10. Why did the grandma refuse to tell a joke? Because she didn’t want to “crack” her age!👵🏻
11. What do you call a grandma who’s always giving advice? A “pro-verb-ial grandma!”
12. Why did the grandma need a new hearing aid? Because she couldn’t “hear” herself think!
13. What’s a grandma’s favorite kind of music? “Golden oldies!” 🎶
14. Why did the grandma get a pet parrot? Because she wanted to have a “wing-man” for her jokes!🦜
15. What do you call a grandma who’s always forgetting things? A “mem-ory-lapse grandma!”
16. Why did the grandma join a bowling league? Because she wanted to get her “strikes” in!🎳
17. What’s a grandma’s favorite type of joke? A “knee-slapper!”
18. Why did the grandma cross the road twice? To get to the other “side” of her joke! 🛣️
19. What do you call a grandma who’s always laughing? A “giggle-box grandma!”
20. Why did the grandma get a pet hamster? Because she wanted a “wheelie” good time! 🐹

Joke Time with Grandma: Laughter Guaranteed!

1. I lost my mood ring. I don’t know how to feel about it.
2. My grandfather has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
3. I once saw a guy wearing a T-shirt that said “Free Hugs.” I hugged him. That’s how I got bed bugs.
4. I’m not a hoarder, I’m a historian… of my own life!
5. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
6. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
7. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
8. What do you call a book about space? A book-stronaut! 📚
9. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
10. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. 🦌
11. What do you call a fish with no tail? Fillet-o-fish!
12. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
13. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick.
14. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
15. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
16. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
17. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
18. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
19. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
20. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.

Grandma’s Pun-ishment: A List of Terrible Jokes

1. What do you call a grandma who loves to tell puns? A grand-pun-isher. 👵
2. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other slide. 🐔
3. What do you call a grandma who’s always late? A fashionably late-nana. ⏰
4. Why did the grandma put her money in the freezer? To make cold, hard cash. 💵❄️
5. What do you call a grandma who’s always bragging about her grandchildren? A grandma-braggart. 🗣️
6. Why did the grandma get a library card? To checkout new gran-reads. 📚
7. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting into trouble? A grand-misdemeanor. 🚓
8. Why did the grandma put her dentures in a glass of water? To make a splash. 💦🦷
9. What do you call a grandma who’s always losing her keys? A key-nesia granny. 🔑
10. Why did the grandma refuse to take a nap? Because she didn’t want to snore and miss out on all the pun.
11. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling corny jokes? A kernel-loving grand-ma. 🌽
12. Why did the grandma get a tattoo? To show off her ink-redible style. ✒️
13. What do you call a grandma who’s always making up stories? A fabric-ating grand-mother. 🧶
14. Why did the grandma cross the ocean? To shell-ebrate her anniversary. 🐚
15. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting lost? A dis-oriented granny. 🧭
16. Why did the grandma go to the doctor? To get a prescription for laughing gas. 💨
17. What do you call a grandma who’s always baking? A muffin-tastic granny. 🧁
18. Why did the grandma get a pet parrot? To have someone to talk to when her dentures are out. 🦜
19. What do you call a grandma who’s always gardening? A flower-loving granny. 💐
20. Why did the grandma join a choir? To sing her heart out and hit all the high notes. 🎶

The Grand Jury of Puns: A Panel of Grandmas Rates the Classics

1. What do you call a grandmother who can’t tell jokes? A “pun-isher” 😂
2. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other side of the joke!
3. What’s a grandma’s favorite type of music? Hip hop! (because it’s all about the old school) 🎶
4. Why did the grandma get lost in the grocery store? Because she took the aisle too seriously!
5. What do you call a grandma who’s always complaining? A “granny grouch”!
6. What do you call a grandma who loves to shop? A “sales-aholic”!
7. Why did the grandma put her dentures in a glass of water? To keep them from waking up with a toothache!
8. What’s a grandma’s favorite kind of dance? The jitterbug! (because it’s all about shaking her cane)
9. Why did the grandma get stuck in the bathtub? Because she used too much soap and couldn’t get a grip!
10. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting into trouble? A “rebel without a clue”!
11. Why did the grandma cross the road with a chicken? To get to the other side of the poultrygeist! 👻
12. What do you call a grandma who’s always making faces? A “grammy grimace”!
13. Why did the grandma have to go to the doctor? Because she had a hip-replacement procedure!
14. What do you call a grandma who’s always baking? A “sweet old gal”!
15. Why did the grandma get a speeding ticket? Because she was driving in the carpool lane with only herself in the car!
16. What do you call a grandma who loves to play Bingo? A “ballin’ grandma”!
17. Why did the grandma have trouble playing Scrabble? Because she kept losing her dentures!
18. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting lost? A “wandering granny”!
19. Why did the grandma get a tattoo? Because she wanted to be “hip” with the grandkids!
20. What do you call a grandma who’s always tripping over things? A “falling star”! 🌟

Grandma’s Got a Pun for Every Occasion

1. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling jokes? A punny grandparent!
2. Why did grandma get lost on her way to the library? She took the wrong book!
3. What do you call a grandma who loves gardening? A green thumb-ster!
4. Why did grandma get a flu shot? So she could stay healthy and keep telling her corny jokes!
5. What do you call a grandma who’s really good at yoga? A flexible elder!
6. Why did grandma cross the road? To get to the other side of the Sudoku puzzle!
7. What do you call a grandma who’s always got a smile on her face? A sun-shiny senior! ☀️
8. Why did grandma get thrown out of the bakery? Because she kept making dough jokes!
9. What do you call a grandma who’s always losing things? A scatterbrain grandma!
10. Why did grandma get a pet parrot? So she could have a bird of prey to make her laugh with puns! 🦜
11. What do you call a grandma who’s really good at cooking? A master chef granny!
12. Why did grandma get a tattoo? To show off her “old school” sense of humor!
13. What do you call a grandma who’s always late to appointments? A fashionably tardy grandma!
14. Why did grandma get a library card? To borrow books on how to be more “punny”!
15. What do you call a grandma who loves to dance? A groovy granny!
16. Why did grandma get a new pair of glasses? To see the world through rose-colored puns!
17. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting into trouble? A mischievous matriarch!
18. Why did grandma get a pacemaker? So she could keep up with her punny heart rate! 👵❤️
19. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling puns about animals? A “meow”ster of puns! 🐈
20. Why did grandma get a new hearing aid? So she could listen to all the puns clearly! 👂

Knock, Knock! Who’s There? Grandma with a Dad Joke

1. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Grandma! Grandma who? Grandma ‘ole knock knock joke!
2. Knock, knock! Who’s there? To be or not to be! To be or not to be who? I’m a little confused, do you want me to be or not to be? 😂
3. Knock, knock! Who’s there? We! We who? We stand tall! 💪
4. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Uranus! Uranus who? Uranus a good day to make a joke!
5. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Tank! Tank who? You’re welcome!
6. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Ho ho! Ho ho who? Your Santa impression needs a little work!
7. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Spell! Spell who? W-H-O!
8. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Idaho! Idaho who? I da ho who loves dad jokes!
9. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Eye! Eye who? Eat your eyes out!
10. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Boo! Boo who? Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!
11. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Cows go! Cows go who? No, cows go moo!
12. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Canoe! Canoe who? Canoe help me with this heavy canoe?
13. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Honeydew! Honeydew who? Honeydew you know how much I love puns?
14. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Olive! Olive who? Olive you very, very much!
15. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Dwayne! Dwayne who? Dwayne the bathtub, I’m dwowning!
16. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Lettuce! Lettuce who? Lettuce in, I’m freezing!
17. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Nobel! Nobel who? Nobel… that’s why I knocked!
18. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Tank! Tank who? You’re welcome!
19. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Vacuum! Vacuum who? Vacuum up some jokes because these are terrible!
20. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Boo! Boo who? Don’t cry, it’s just a joke!

Grandma’s Puns: So Bad They’re Good

1. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling jokes? A pun-derful granny!
2. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other pun-ishment.
3. What do you call a grandma who loves to dance? A boogie-grandma! 😂
4. Why did the grandma get lost in the grocery store? Because she couldn’t find the aisle of puns.
5. What’s a grandma’s favorite type of music? Grand-slam!
6. Why are grandmas so good at telling jokes? Because they’ve had plenty of practice with their grandkids.
7. What do you call a grandma who’s always losing her keys? Grandma door-getful!
8. What do you call a grandma who’s always gardening? A green thumb grandma.
9. Why did the grandma join a choir? Because she wanted to sing her puns out loud.
10. What do you call a grandma who’s always baking? A sugar grandma.
11. Why did the grandma get a library card? To check out all the punny books.
12. What do you call a grandma who’s always taking naps? A slumber-grandma.
13. Why are grandmas so wise? Because they’ve seen it all and pun it all.
14. What do you call a grandma who’s always knitting? A yarn-grandma.
15. Why did the grandma go to the doctor? Because she was feeling pun-der the weather.
16. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling bad jokes? A groan-grandma.
17. Why did the grandma cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
18. What do you call a grandma who’s always losing her glasses? A near-sighted grandma.
19. Why are grandmas so good at puzzles? Because they’ve had a lifetime of experience putting things together.
20. What do you call a grandma who’s always making messes? A disaster-grandma.

Grandmas: The Masters of Pun Intended

1. What do you call a grandma who loves to make jokes? A pun-derful grandma!
2. Why are grandmas so good at making puns? Because they’re seasoned pros! 👵
3. What do you call a grandma who’s always late? Grandmother Time! ⌚
4. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other scone! 😋
5. What do you call a grandma who’s always on the go? A grand-hustler! 🏃‍♀️
6. What do you call a grandma who’s a great dancer? A grand-ma-ballerina! 🩰
7. Why did the grandma get lost in the forest? Because she couldn’t find her bear-ings! 🌲
8. What do you call a grandma who’s always making breakfast? A grand-ma-chef! 🍳
9. Why are grandmas so good at taking care of kids? Because they’ve had years of practice on their grandkids! 👶
10. What do you call a grandma who’s a superhero? A grand-ma-ter! 🦸‍♀️
11. Why did the grandma go to the doctor? She had a grand-ma-malady! 🤕
12. What do you call a grandma who’s always making mistakes? A grand-ma-mistake-er! 🤷‍♀️
13. Why did the grandma get a new car? Because she wanted to drive a grand-ma-chine! 🚗
14. What do you call a grandma who’s always falling asleep? A grand-ma-snoozer! 😴
15. Why did the grandma join a choir? Because she wanted to sing grand-ma-dies! 🎶
16. What do you call a grandma who’s always forgetting things? A grand-ma-nesia! 🧠
17. Why did the grandma go to the library? To check out some grand-ma-terials! 📚
18. What do you call a grandma who’s always cooking? A grand-ma-chef! 👩‍🍳
19. Why did the grandma get a tattoo? Because she wanted to be a grand-ma-ma! 👵
20. What do you call a grandma who’s always arguing with her husband? A grand-ma-drama-queen! 🎭

When Life Gives You Lemons, Grandma Makes a Pun

1. What do you call a grandma who’s always making puns? A “pun-ny” grandma!
2. Why did the grandma cross the road? To get to the other “sigh” 😉
3. What do you call a grandma who loves to bake? A “muffin” grandma!
4. What do you call a grandma who’s always forgetting things? A “senior” moment 😉
5. What do you call a grandma who’s always giving advice? A “wise” grandma!
6. What do you call a grandma who’s always getting into trouble? A “naughty” grandma!
7. What do you call a grandma who’s always laughing? A “happy” grandma!
8. What do you call a grandma who’s always singing? A “musical” grandma!
9. What do you call a grandma who’s always dancing? A “groovy” grandma!
10. What do you call a grandma who’s always telling jokes? A “punny” grandma!
11. What do you call a grandma who’s always gardening? A “green thumb” grandma!
12. What do you call a grandma who’s always knitting? A “yarn” grandma!
13. What do you call a grandma who’s always cooking? A “foodie” grandma!
14. What do you call a grandma who’s always reading? A “bookworm” grandma!
15. What do you call a grandma who’s always painting? An “artful” grandma!
16. What do you call a grandma who’s always traveling? An “explorer” grandma!
17. What do you call a grandma who’s always volunteering? A “caring” grandma!
18. What do you call a grandma who’s always playing games? A “gamer” grandma!
19. What do you call a grandma who’s always online? A “tech-savvy” grandma!
20. What do you call a grandma who’s always laughing? A “punny” grandma!

Grandma’s Jokes: The Perfect Icebreaker for Any Occasion

1. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
2. What do you call a person who’s afraid of Santa Claus? Claus-trophobic.
3. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
4. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
5. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
6. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. 🦌
7. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
8. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
9. What do you call a person who’s afraid of Santa Claus? Claus-trophobic.
10. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
11. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
12. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. 🦌
13. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
14. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
15. What do you call a person who’s afraid of Santa Claus? Claus-trophobic.
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
17. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
18. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. 🦌
19. What do you call grandma’s favorite joke book? The punny bone.
20. What do you call grandma’s favorite type of humor? Icebreaker jokes. 🧊

Bruna Silva

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