176+ Construction Puns to Nail Down the Laughs!

Hey there, construction enthusiasts and pun lovers! Welcome to my building puns extravaganza, where I’ll unleash a barrage of construction-themed puns that will leave you laughing and making your fellow workers groan. As a construction worker myself, I’ve witnessed firsthand the hilarious and often absurd situations that arise on the job site, and let me tell you, the puns are endless.So, grab your tool belts, put on your safety glasses, and prepare to be entertained as we dive into the world of construction puns. From our resident “pun-isher” to the ever-tardy “procrastin-hammer,” we’ve got a pun for every construction-related mishap and misadventure. Brace yourself for a laughter-filled journey as we uncover the “hazard-cones,” “screw-ups,” and “lost-causes” that make our industry so entertaining. And don’t forget the “concrete-mixers” and “big headaches” โ€“ they’re always lurking around the corner! Whether you’re a seasoned pro or a construction newbie, these puns are guaranteed to make your day. So, let’s get this pun-derful show on the road and build a solid foundation of laughter together!

I’m a construction worker and I’m always getting into trouble for making puns.

  1. I’m so good at building relationships, I could build a bridge between Chuck Norris and Spongebob! ๐Ÿ‘ซ๐Ÿ˜‚
  2. What do you call a contractor who’s always getting into trouble for making puns? A pun-isher! ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ”จ
  3. Why are construction workers so bad at math? Because they always measure twice, cut once, and then swear three times! ๐Ÿ“๐Ÿ“๐Ÿคฌ
  4. What do you get when you cross a construction worker and a comedian? A brick-layer of laughs! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿงฑ
  5. Why did the construction worker get arrested? Because he had an outstanding trowel! ๐Ÿ‘ฎโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿš”
  6. What do you call a construction worker who’s always late? A procrastin-hammer! ๐Ÿ•’๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  7. Why did the construction worker get a promotion? Because he knew how to crane his neck! ๐Ÿ—๏ธ๐Ÿ’ช
  8. What do you call a construction worker who can control the weather? A roofer-douser! โ˜”๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  9. Why are construction workers so good at problem-solving? Because they know how to nail every issue! ๐Ÿ”จ๐Ÿ‘
  10. What do you call a construction worker who’s always up for a challenge? A stud finder! ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  11. Why did the construction worker win the lottery? Because he hit the jackpot! ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  12. What do you call a construction worker who’s always singing? A tool-slayer! ๐ŸŽต๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  13. Why did the construction worker get lost? Because he didn’t have a level head! ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿšง๐Ÿค”
  14. What do you call a construction worker who’s always on vacation? A beach-builder! ๐Ÿ–๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ๏ธ
  15. Why did the construction worker get a speeding ticket? Because he was driving a concrete mixer too fast! ๐Ÿš”๐Ÿ’จ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  16. What do you call a construction worker who’s always making mistakes? A plumb-dinger! ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ”จ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  17. Why did the construction worker get a divorce? Because he was always putting up walls! ๐Ÿšง๐Ÿ’”
  18. What do you call a construction worker who’s always making messes? A dirt-slinger! ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿงน
  19. Why did the construction worker get a cold? Because he was working in freezing conditions! ๐Ÿคง๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿฅถ
  20. What do you call a construction worker who’s always breaking things? A demolisher! ๐Ÿ”จ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฅ

I guess you could say I’m a bit of a pun-isher.

  1. I guess you could say I’m a bit of a pun-isher. ๐Ÿ˜
  2. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  3. Why couldn’t the bicycle smile? Because it was two tired!
  4. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick. Boomerang joke
  5. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
  6. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
  7. Why did the math book look so sad? Because it was full of problems!
  8. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
  9. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  10. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
  11. Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
  12. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
  13. Why did the computer become a vegetarian? Because it couldn’t stomach any more bytes!
  14. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
  15. Why did the math teacher marry the geometry teacher? Because she had nice angles!
  16. What do you call a fish with two legs? A walking fish.
  17. Why did the golfer take two pairs of pants to the course? In case he got a hole-in-one!
  18. What do you call a lazy egg? A couch potato.
  19. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
  20. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!

What do you call a construction worker who’s always late?

  1. A nail-biter
  2. A hammerhead
  3. A carpenter ant-sy
  4. A procrastin-hammer
  5. A lazy beam
  6. A slow-tile
  7. A tardy trowel ๐Ÿ› ๏ธ
  8. A slacking screed
  9. A procrastin-screwer
  10. A putty-off
  11. A rebar-tard
  12. A plumb-late
  13. A lagging lintel
  14. A brick-layer down
  15. A slow-mo joist
  16. A lagging ladder
  17. A behind-schedule scaffolding
  18. A tardy tape measure ๐Ÿ“
  19. A late-lath
  20. A back-hoe-sloth
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A procrastin-hammer.

  1. Why did the lazy carpenter use a procrastin-hammer? Because he wanted to hit the nail when he felt like it!
  2. What do you get when you cross a procrastinator and a superhero? Someone who’s always putting off saving the day!
  3. Why was the procrastin-hammer so useless? Because it couldn’t even hammer in the point!
  4. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always late? A hammer-head!
  5. Why didn’t the procrastin-hammer get the job done? Because it was too busy putting it off!
  6. What’s the difference between a procrastin-hammer and a regular hammer? About two weeks!
  7. Why did the procrastin-hammer get stuck in the driveway? Because it was waiting for the perfect time to get out! ๐Ÿ˜‚
  8. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always breaking promises? A hammer-faker!
  9. Why did the procrastin-hammer get lost in the woods? Because it was too lazy to follow the trail!
  10. What do you get when you combine a procrastin-hammer and a clock? A time-wasting machine! โฐ
  11. Why did the procrastin-hammer have a bad reputation? Because it was always dropping the ball!
  12. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always making excuses? A hammer-blamer!
  13. Why was the procrastin-hammer so popular with students? Because it helped them postpone all their assignments!
  14. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always getting distracted? A hammer-fly!
  15. Why did the procrastin-hammer get fired from its job? Because it was too slow to the draw! ๐Ÿข
  16. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always complaining? A hammer-grouch!
  17. Why did the procrastin-hammer get a speeding ticket? Because it was always rushing to do everything at the last minute! ๐Ÿšจ
  18. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always taking breaks? A hammer-slacker!
  19. Why did the procrastin-hammer join a support group? Because it needed help getting motivated!
  20. What do you call a procrastin-hammer that’s always procrastinating? A hammer-morra!

What do you call a construction worker who’s always getting into accidents?

  1. A “falling” hazard
  2. A “concrete” case of bad luck
  3. A “beam” of light in a sea of mishaps
  4. A “brick” wall of misfortune ๐Ÿ”ง
  5. A “screw” loose when it comes to safety ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  6. A “hammer” time for some serious pain ๐Ÿ”จ
  7. A “nail”biter when it comes to accidents ๐Ÿ”ฉ
  8. A “tyre”d of getting hurt ๐Ÿš—
  9. A “wrench” in the system of safety ๐Ÿ”ง
  10. A “scaffold”ing risk to his health ๐Ÿ› ๏ธ
  11. A “level” of carelessness that’s off the charts ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  12. A “spark” of bad luck that keeps igniting โšก๏ธ
  13. A “hole” lot of trouble for the construction zone ๐Ÿ•ณ๏ธ
  14. A “safety” hazard that’s a “nail” in the coffin โšฐ๏ธ
  15. A “backhoe” of pain that just keeps digging ๐Ÿšœ
  16. A “cement” mixer of unfortunate events ๐Ÿšง
  17. A “sky” is the limit for his mishaps ๐Ÿ›ซ
  18. A “tool” time for disaster to strike ๐Ÿ› ๏ธ
  19. A “ladder” to nowhere but down the rabbit hole of accidents ๐Ÿชœ
  20. A “jackhammer”ing headache from all the collisions

A hazard-cone.

  • It’s a traffic cone-undrum! ๐Ÿšง
  • What do you call a construction worker who’s always late? A traffic-cone-sistent offender! ๐Ÿ‘ทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  • Why did the traffic cone get lost? Because it was a bit of a hazard-nous driver! ๐Ÿš—
  • What do you call a traffic cone that’s been in the sun too long? A sun-cone! ๐ŸŒž
  • What do you get when you cross a traffic cone with a coffee cup? A caffeine-cone-ation! โ˜•
  • Why did the traffic cone get a sunburn? Because it was out standing in its field! ๐Ÿ˜Ž
  • What do you call a traffic cone with a bad attitude? A cone-frontationalist! ๐Ÿ˜ก
  • Why did the traffic cone become a musician? Because it wanted to drum up some excitement! ๐Ÿฅ
  • What do you call a traffic cone that’s always in a good mood? A cone-gratulator! ๐ŸŽ‰
  • Why did the traffic cone decide to become a doctor? Because it wanted to help people get off their feet! ๐Ÿ‘จโ€โš•๏ธ

What do you call a construction worker who’s always making mistakes?

  1. A mis-bricklayer
  2. A faulty framer
  3. A hammer-headed handyman
  4. A screw-up stud finder
  5. A concrete clunker
  6. A nail-biting novice
  7. A spanner in the works ๐Ÿ”ง
  8. A wrenching worker
  9. A level-headed loser
  10. A studly screw-up
  11. A drywall disaster
  12. A tiling time-waster
  13. A leaky laughingstock ๐Ÿ˜‚
  14. A shoddy shower installer
  15. A window-washing woofer
  16. A roofing rube
  17. A tile-laying twirp
  18. A plastering poser
  19. A beamish bumbler
  20. A rebarred rebel

A screw-up.

  1. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down!
  2. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  3. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! ๐Ÿคฃ
  4. I’m not a dad, but I know how to make a dad joke: What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus!
  5. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick!
  6. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
  7. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time!
  8. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
  9. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!
  10. Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash! ๐Ÿ’ต
  11. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
  12. Why did the math book look so sad? Because it was full of problems! ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  13. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
  14. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! โ›ณ
  15. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe!
  16. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
  17. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick!
  18. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
  19. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time!
  20. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
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What do you call a construction worker who’s always getting lost?

  1. A framer who’s always lost! ๐Ÿคช
  2. A roofer who can’t find his way home!
  3. A bricklayer who’s always building himself up!
  4. A plumber who’s always down in the dumps! ๐Ÿšฝ
  5. A carpenter who’s always cutting corners!
  6. A painter who’s always drawing a blank!
  7. A welder who’s always burning rubber! ๐Ÿ”ฅ
  8. A landscaper who’s always getting lost in the weeds! ๐ŸŒณ
  9. A concrete worker who’s always stuck in a rut! ๐Ÿšง
  10. A steel worker who’s always rusty! ๐Ÿ”ฉ
  11. A glass worker who’s always in a window! ๐Ÿชž
  12. A plumber who’s always flushed with ideas! ๐Ÿ’ก
  13. A carpenter who’s always making wood jokes! ๐Ÿชต๐Ÿคฃ
  14. A painter who’s always painting the town red! ๐ŸŽจโค๏ธ
  15. A mason who’s always building bridges! ๐Ÿค
  16. A roofer who’s always going up in the world! ๐ŸŒ
  17. A plumber who’s always making waves! ๐ŸŒŠ
  18. A carpenter who’s always getting nailed! ๐Ÿ”จ
  19. A landscaper who’s always getting down to earth! ๐ŸŒฑ
  20. A contractor who’s always working on his next great pyramid scheme! ๐Ÿ’ฐ

A lost-cause.

  1. What do you call a joke that’s so bad it’s beyond hope? A lost-cause. ๐Ÿคญ
  2. Why did the joke go to the asylum? Because it was a lost-cause.
  3. How do you fix a lost-cause joke? You can’t. It’s hopelessly broken. ๐Ÿ’”
  4. What do you get when you cross a lost-cause joke with a bad joke? A double-whammy of unfunny. ๐Ÿคช
  5. Why did the lost-cause joke join a support group? To share its misery with others. ๐Ÿ˜”
  6. What’s the difference between a lost-cause joke and a dead horse? The dead horse doesn’t mind being beaten. ๐Ÿ™„
  7. What do you call a joke that has no hope of being funny? A lost-cause.
  8. What do you call a pun that’s so bad it makes you want to cry? A lost-cause. ๐Ÿ˜ญ
  9. What’s the first step in fixing a lost-cause joke? Admitting that it’s a lost-cause. ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™€๏ธ
  10. What do you call a joke that’s gone off the rails? A lost-cause.
  11. What do you get when you mix a lost-cause joke with a lame pun? A train wreck of humor. ๐Ÿš‚๐Ÿ’ฅ
  12. What do you call a joke that’s so bad it’s painful? A lost-cause. ๐Ÿค•
  13. Why did the lost-cause joke cross the road? To get to the other side of unfunny. ๐Ÿ˜…
  14. What do you call a joke that’s so bad it makes you cringe? A lost-cause. ๐Ÿ˜–
  15. What’s the worst part about a lost-cause joke? That it’s not even worth the effort to groan. ๐Ÿฅฑ
  16. What’s the best way to deal with a lost-cause joke? Run away as fast as you can. ๐Ÿ’จ
  17. What do you call a joke that’s so bad it’s contagious? A lost-cause. ๐Ÿ˜ท
  18. Why did the lost-cause joke get fired? For being hopelessly unfunny. ๐Ÿ’ผโŒ
  19. What do you call a joke that’s so bad it makes you want to scream? A lost-cause. ๐Ÿคฌ
  20. What’s the difference between a lost-cause joke and a good joke? A good joke has a punchline. ๐Ÿ‘Š

What do you call a construction worker who’s always getting into fights?

  1. A handyman who’s always getting into brawls? A “hammer-handed fighter”
  2. A carpenter who’s a master of martial arts? A “kick saw”
  3. A plumber who’s always ready for a rumble? A “wrenching wrestler”
  4. A bricklayer who’s a boxing champ? A “brick-fisted bruiser”
  5. An electrician who’s always getting into trouble? A “hot-wired hooligan”
  6. A roofer who’s a skilled swordsman? A “tile-swiping samurai”
  7. A painter who’s a master of disguise? A “camouflage chameleon”
  8. A welder who’s a master of close combat? A “soldering specialist”
  9. A landscaper who’s always getting into fights? A “rake-wielding ruffian”
  10. A demolition expert who’s always ready for a brawl? A “wrecking ball warrior”
  11. A concrete mixer driver who’s a top-notch boxer? A “slugger with a cement mixer”
  12. A construction worker who’s always getting into bar fights? A “happy hour hooligan”
  13. A contractor who’s a master of hand-to-hand combat? A “punching contractor”
  14. A foreman who’s always ready to throw down? A “heavy-handed boss”
  15. A construction worker who’s always getting into arguments? A “hammer-dropping debater”
  16. A carpenter who’s a black belt in karate? A “board-breaking brawler”
  17. A plumber who’s a skilled wrestler? A “pipe-wrenching pugilist”
  18. A bricklayer who’s a master of the ancient art of Shaolin? A “brick-throwing Buddhist”
  19. An electrician who’s always ready to fight? A “voltage-charged vigilante”
  20. A construction worker who’s always getting into trouble with the law? A “code-violating convict”
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A concrete-mixer.

  1. How do you fix a cracked concrete mixer? With a cement patch!
  2. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always late? A tardy-mix!
  3. Why did the contractor hire a concrete mixer that only spoke Spanish? Because he wanted a mixer with a “smooth finish!”
  4. What did the concrete mixer say when it got lost? “Am I in the right lane?” ๐Ÿ˜ฎ
  5. Why did the concrete mixer go to the doctor? Because it had a rumbly-tummy!
  6. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always getting into trouble? A rebel with a cause! ๐Ÿšง
  7. Why did the concrete mixer get a speeding ticket? Because it was going too fast and furious!
  8. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s too lazy to work? A slacker with a mixer! ๐Ÿฆฅ
  9. Why did the concrete mixer get a haircut? Because it needed a trim!
  10. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always in a rush? A quick-mix!
  11. Why did the concrete mixer get a new paint job? Because it wanted to look sharp!
  12. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always getting lost? A lost-mixer! ๐Ÿ—บ๏ธ
  13. Why did the concrete mixer go to the zoo? To see the hippos and elephants!
  14. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always breaking down? A fixer-upper!
  15. Why did the concrete mixer go to the library? To check out some heavy reading!
  16. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always tired? A slow-mixer! ๐Ÿฅฑ
  17. Why did the concrete mixer join a choir? Because it wanted to sing in a mixed voice!
  18. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always getting into arguments? A mixer with an attitude!
  19. Why did the concrete mixer get a new engine? Because it wanted to be a high-performance mixer! ๐ŸŽ๏ธ
  20. What do you call a concrete mixer that’s always getting lost? A lost-mixer!

What do you call a construction worker who’s always getting into trouble?

  1. A bricklayer who’s always getting arrested. ๐Ÿงฑ๐Ÿคฃ
  2. A plumber who’s always getting into hot water. โ™จ๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚
  3. A carpenter who’s always getting hammered. ๐Ÿ”จ๐Ÿ˜…
  4. A painter who’s always getting into a pickle. ๐Ÿ–ผ๏ธ๐Ÿฅ’
  5. A landscaper who’s always getting into weeds. ๐ŸŒฒ๐ŸŒฟ
  6. A welder who’s always getting sparks. โšก๏ธ๐Ÿ”ฅ
  7. A glazier who’s always getting into a pane. ๐ŸชŸ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ
  8. A electrician who’s always getting shocked. โšก๐Ÿ˜ฒ
  9. A roofer who’s always getting into the gutter. ๐ŸŒง๏ธ๐Ÿ 
  10. A bricklayer who’s always making a mess. ๐Ÿงฑ๐Ÿ’ฃ
  11. A electrician who’s always brighter than everyone else. ๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿค“
  12. A plumber who’s always up to his neck in it. ๐Ÿ’ง๐Ÿคทโ€โ™€๏ธ
  13. A carpenter who’s always making a killing. ๐Ÿ”จ๐Ÿ’ฐ
  14. A painter who’s always splashing out. ๐ŸŽจ๐Ÿ’ธ
  15. A landscaper who’s always green with envy. ๐Ÿ€๐ŸŒฟ
  16. A welder who’s always hot under the collar. ๐Ÿฅต๐Ÿ”ฅ
  17. A glazier who’s always transparent about his feelings. ๐ŸชŸ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  18. A electrician who’s always buzzing with energy. โšก๏ธ๐Ÿ
  19. A roofer who’s always on top of things. ๐Ÿ ๐Ÿ‘
  20. A bricklayer who’s always laying the groundwork. ๐Ÿงฑ๐Ÿ’ช

A big headache.

  • I have a headache so bad that I can’t even think straight. ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ
  • My headache is so bad, I can’t even lift my head. ๐Ÿค•
  • I have a headache so bad, it feels like someone’s trying to drill a hole in my skull. โ›๏ธ
  • My headache is so bad, I’m starting to see double. ๐Ÿ‘€
  • I have a headache so bad, I can’t even remember my own name. ๐Ÿค”
  • My headache is so bad, I’m starting to forget how to breathe. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ
  • I have a headache so bad, I can’t even count to ten without losing track. ๐Ÿ”ข
  • My headache is so bad, I’m starting to think I might have a brain tumor. ๐Ÿง 
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to get jealous of people who have no head. ๐Ÿ‘ค
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might be allergic to my own brain. ๐Ÿง ๐Ÿคง
  • My headache is so bad, I’m starting to wish I had a lobotomy. โœ‚๏ธ
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might be a walking zombie. ๐ŸงŸโ€โ™‚๏ธ
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might be possessed by a demon. ๐Ÿ˜ˆ
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might need an exorcism. โœ๏ธ
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might need a new head. ๐Ÿ’†โ€โ™‚๏ธ
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might need a lobotomy. ๐Ÿง โœ‚๏ธ
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might need to see a neurologist. ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš•๏ธ๐Ÿง 
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might need to see a psychiatrist. ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš•๏ธ๐Ÿง 
  • I have a headache so bad, I’m starting to think I might need to see a priest. โœ๏ธ

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