140+ Vampire Puns That Will Make You Fangs for More!

Are you ready to sink your teeth into some hilarious vampire puns that will leave you batty with laughter? Join us on this fang-tastic voyage into the realm of wordplay, where the undead come to life through side-splitting puns.From puns that will make you howl like a werewolf to jokes that will leave you laughing in the graveyard, we’ve got a blood-curdling collection of vampire puns that will satisfy your thirst for humor. These puns are a grave situation, but don’t worry, they won’t leave you lifeless. Instead, they’ll inject a bit of Transylvanian twist into your day.Whether you’re a seasoned vampire enthusiast or just a fan of good, clean fun, these puns will hit the mark. So, gather your coven of laughter-loving friends and prepare for a ghoulish gag-a-thon that will leave you with fangs for the memories. Get ready to chuckle, cackle, and embrace the undying humor of vampire puns!

Vampire Puns that’ll Make You Batty

  1. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? Vlad the Impaler! 🧛
  2. Why did the vampire get lost on his way to the blood bank? Because he mistook the moon for a giant garlic bulb! 😂
  3. What do you call a vampire who’s really good at math? Count Dracula! 🧮
  4. Why did the vampire cross the road? To get to the other coffin! ⚰️
  5. What do you call a vampire who’s always cold? A blood popsicle! 🥶
  6. Why did the vampire get in trouble with his boss? Because he was caught bat-napping! 🦇
  7. What do you call a vampire who’s always thirsty? A blood-aholic! 🍷
  8. Why did the vampire stop drinking from a blood bank? Because he got a little anemic! 🤦‍♂️
  9. What do you call a vampire who’s really clumsy? A bat-brained blunderer! 🤪
  10. Why did the vampire open a hair salon? Because he wanted to give people the fright of their lives! 💇‍♂️
  11. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? Count De-Lay-cula! ⏰
  12. Why did the vampire get invited to the pool party? Because he was a real life-saver! 🏊‍♂️
  13. What do you call a vampire who’s always sleepy? A coffin-couch potato! 😴
  14. Why did the vampire quit his job as a dentist? Because he was always getting fang-led! 🪥
  15. What do you call a vampire who’s really good at basketball? Count Drac-ula! 🏀
  16. Why did the vampire get a pet bat? Because he wanted a wing-man! 🦇
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A Vlad-saster! 💥
  18. Why did the vampire get a refund on his car insurance? Because he was never at stake! 🚗
  19. What do you call a vampire who’s really bad at singing? Count Off-Key-ula! 🎶
  20. Why did the vampire get a library card? Because he wanted to bat-ten down the hatches! 📚

Fang-tastic Puns for the Undead

  • What do you call a vampire who only drinks plasma? A blood purist.
  • Why are vampires so good at math? Because they can count on their fangs.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always losing his teeth? A fang-tastic failure.
  • Why did the vampire get a cold? Because he was hanging around with too many bats.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A bloodthirsty hooligan. 🧛
  • Why did the vampire go to the dentist? To get his fangs capped.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always on the go? A bloodsucking speed demon.
  • Why did the vampire get lost in the forest? Because he couldn’t see in the dark.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always making jokes? A pun-ishing bloodsucker.
  • Why did the vampire get a sunburn? Because he didn’t wear sun-fang.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always late? A bloodthirsty procrastinator.
  • Why did the vampire win the race? Because he had a bloodlust for victory.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s obsessed with cleanliness? A bloodthirsty germaphobe.
  • Why did the vampire get a job as a lifeguard? Because he wanted to save lives by sinking his teeth into them. 🧛
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always hungry? A bloodthirsty glutton.
  • Why did the vampire get kicked out of the restaurant? Because he kept asking for bloody marys.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always buying things? A bloodthirsty shopaholic. 🛍️
  • Why did the vampire become a vegan? Because he wanted to try a plant-based diet.
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A bloodthirsty GPS challenge.

Blood-Curdling Vampire Jokes to Sink Your Teeth Into

  1. What do you call a vampire with a great sense of humor? A coffin-joke-tarian!
  2. Why did the vampire cross the road? To get to the bat cave!
  3. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a scarecrow? A blood-sucking straw man!
  4. Why did the vampire get lost? Because he couldn’t read the map-ula!
  5. What do you call a vampire that’s always late? A tardy-ula!
  6. Why did the vampire take a bath? To wash off his coffin-dust!
  7. What do you call a vampire who’s a math whiz? A blood-culator!
  8. Why are vampires such bad dancers? Because they have two left feet!
  9. What do you call a vampire who’s always cold? A Frosy-cula! 🧛‍♂️
  10. What do you call a vampire who’s always singing? A hem-oglob-in!
  11. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a flashlight? A beam-me-up, batty!
  12. Why don’t vampires like the beach? Because they can’t stand the sun!
  13. What do you call a vampire who’s always down in the dumps? A sad-ucla!
  14. Why did the vampire get a job at the soup kitchen? Because he wanted to feed the hungry! 🍲
  15. What do you call a vampire who’s a great chef? A fang-tastic cook!
  16. Why did the vampire wear a vest? Because he didn’t want to show off his batwings!
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the lookout for the latest gossip? A fangirl!
  18. Why are vampires so good at playing hide-and-seek? Because they’re already undead and hiding in the shadows!
  19. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A bat-tle-scarred veteran!
  20. Why did the vampire refuse to go to the hospital? Because he didn’t want a blood test! 🧛‍♂️
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Bite-Sized Puns for the Bloodthirsty

  1. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the go? A bloodhound!
  2. Why did the vampire get lost? Because he took a wrong turn in Transylvania! 🧛‍♀️
  3. What do you call a vampire who’s always laughing? A bloodsucker with a sense of humor!
  4. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A pain in the neck!
  5. Why did the vampire get a cold? Because he was out in the open coffin too long! 🤧
  6. What do you call a vampire who’s always thirsty? A pint-sized predator!
  7. Why did the vampire go to the bank? To cash in his blood money! 💰
  8. What do you call a vampire who’s always on top? A bat-tlefield commander! 🦇
  9. Why did the vampire get a library card? To check out Fang-tastic books!
  10. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the lookout? A night watchman!
  11. Why did the vampire get a job at the zoo? To work in the bat cave!
  12. What do you call a vampire who’s always bragging? A blood-sucking show-off!
  13. Why did the vampire get a pet bat? To have a wingman!
  14. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? A blood-sucking procrastinator!
  15. Why did the vampire get a tattoo? To have a permanent bloodline! 🩸
  16. What do you call a vampire who’s always playing video games? A blood-sucking gamer!
  17. Why did the vampire get a Ph.D.? To become a blood-sucking doctor! 🎓
  18. What do you call a vampire who’s always on vacation? A blood-sucking globetrotter! 🏝
  19. Why did the vampire get a job as a chef? To make bloody marys! 🍹
  20. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A blood-sucking directionally challenged! 🗺

A Grave Situation: Vampire Puns for the Lifeless

  1. What do you call a vampire who loves to scuba dive? A deep-sea sucker!
  2. Why did the vampire avoid the dentist? Because they didn’t want to get their fangs capped!
  3. What did the zombie say to the vampire? “You’re killing me!”
  4. Why are vampires such good dancers? Because they’re dead on their feet!
  5. What do you call a vampire with a fake tan? An eternal nightlight!
  6. Why are vampires so good at math? Because they’re always counting on blood!
  7. What did the vampire say to the human? “I vant to suck your blood!”🧛
  8. Why did the vampire get lost in the forest? Because they couldn’t find their way out of the dead end!
  9. What do you call a vampire who loves to read? A bloodsucking bookworm!
  10. Why did the vampire get a library card? To check out the latest blood-curdling novels!
  11. What do you call a vampire who’s always freezing? A chills and fever!
  12. Why are vampires so bad at playing hide-and-seek? Because they always leave a bloody trail!
  13. What do you call a vampire who’s always thirsty? A blood-sucking water fountain!
  14. Why did the vampire cross the road? To get to the other coffin!
  15. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? Count Dracul-ait!
  16. Why did the vampire get a job as a bartender? To serve up blood-red cocktails!
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always losing their belongings? Count-less!
  18. Why are vampires such good bowlers? Because they have a perfect strike rate!
  19. What do you call a vampire who’s always sleepy? Count Somnolent!
  20. Why did the vampire get a tattoo? To ink-crease their bloodlust!

Transylvanian Twisters: Puns for the Count

  1. Fang-tastically funny puns that will make you batty. 🦇
  2. Grave puns that will make you coffin up with laughter. 💀
  3. Transylvania-lyzing puns that will leave you spellbound. 🧛‍♂️
  4. Bloodcurdling puns that will make you scream with glee. 🩸
  5. Spooktacular puns that will haunt your nightmares (in a good way). 👻
  6. Ghoulish puns that will make your ribs rattle. 😱
  7. Monster-sized puns that will leave you howling. 🐺
  8. Eerie puns that will send shivers down your spine. 🥶
  9. Mummy-licious puns that will wrap you up in laughter. 🧻
  10. Bone-chilling puns that will make your teeth chatter. ❄️
  11. Boo-tiful puns that will leave you feeling spooktacular. 👻
  12. Skull-duggery puns that will make you laugh your head off. 💀
  13. Head-spinning puns that will make you lose your gourd. 🎃
  14. Vampire-rific puns that will suck the laughter out of you. 🧛‍♂️
  15. Creepy-crawly puns that will make your skin crawl. 🕷️
  16. Hair-raising puns that will make you stand on end. 😱
  17. Shadowy puns that will make you jump at your own shadow. 👤
  18. Spine-tingling puns that will make your blood run cold. 🩸
  19. Witching hour puns that will cast a spell on you. 🧙‍♀️
  20. Eerie-sistable puns that will leave you howling at the moon. 🌕

Undying Humor: Timeless Vampire Puns

  1. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? 🧛‍♂️ ⏰ A procrastinating bloodsucker!
  2. Why did the vampire join the Red Cross? 🩸💉 To suck up to people in need!
  3. What’s a vampire’s favorite type of music? 🎶 🧛‍♂️ Bat-rock!
  4. Why are vampires bad dancers? 🧛‍♂️💃 Because they’re always dead on their feet!
  5. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the go? 🏃‍♂️🧛‍♂️ Count Commute-ula!
  6. Why did the vampire get a cold? 🤧🧛‍♂️ He was out in the coffin too long!
  7. What do you call a vampire who’s really good at math? 🧮🧛‍♂️ A Count Calcula!
  8. Why don’t vampires like garlic? 🧄🧛‍♂️ It gives them bad breath!
  9. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? 🧛‍♂️🚓 A Count-down comedian!
  10. Why are vampires so good at keeping secrets? 🔒🧛‍♂️ Because they’re always in the dark!
  11. What’s a vampire’s favorite subject in school? 🧛‍♂️📚 Blood chemistry!
  12. Why did the vampire get a new car? 🚗🧛‍♂️ Because his old one was a hearse!
  13. What do you call a vampire who’s really into fitness? 🧛‍♂️🏋️‍♂️ A Count Dracul-athlete!
  14. Why don’t vampires use computers? 💻🧛‍♂️ Because they’re afraid of the Byte!
  15. What’s a vampire’s favorite type of movie? 🧛‍♂️🎥 A fanged-tastic one!
  16. Why did the vampire open up a restaurant? 🧛‍♂️🍽️ To serve up some bloody good meals!
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the lookout for a partner? 🧛‍♂️💍 Count Match-maker!
  18. Why did the vampire get lost? 🧛‍♂️🗺️ Because he couldn’t find his way in the sunlight!
  19. What do you call a vampire who’s really good at hiding? 🧛‍♂️🎭 A Count Disguise-ula!
  20. Why did the vampire decide to become a doctor? 🧛‍♂️💊 Because he wanted to cure his patients of their blood-loss problems!
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Batty Jokes to Keep You Laughing in the Night

  1. What do you call a bat with no teeth? A gummy bat! 🦇
  2. Why did the bat get lost? Because it couldn’t echolocate! 👻
  3. What do you call a bat that’s always late? A batty tard! ⏰
  4. Why did the bat cross the road? To get to the bat cave! 🏠
  5. What do you call a bat that loves heavy metal music? A bat head! 🤘
  6. Why did the bat break up with its girlfriend? Because it was always hanging upside down! 🙃
  7. What do you call a bat that’s afraid of the dark? A bat-ophobe! 😨
  8. Why did the bat get a job at the factory? Because it was a skilled night shifter! 🌙
  9. What do you call a bat that’s always getting into trouble? A batty nuisance! 😈
  10. Why did the bat go to the doctor? Because it had a bat-tery problem! 🔋
  11. What do you call a bat that loves to dance? A bat-a-holic! 💃
  12. Why did the bat get fired from its job? Because it was always bat-tling with the other employees! ⚔️
  13. What do you call a bat that’s always bragging? A bat-o-holic! 🏆
  14. Why did the bat get a tattoo? Because it wanted to show off its bat-itude! 🎨
  15. What do you call a bat that’s always getting into fights? A bat-tle-wielder! 🥊
  16. Why did the bat join the army? Because it wanted to be a bat-talion commander! 🎖️
  17. What do you call a bat that’s always forgetting things? A bat-tle-of-wits! 🧠
  18. Why did the bat get a haircut? Because it wanted to look bat-ter! 💇‍♂️
  19. What do you call a bat that’s always making people laugh? A bat-ter-box! 😂
  20. Why did the bat get a job as a teacher? Because it was a bat-ter-at-education! 📚

Crimson Comedy: Vampire Puns that Pack a Bite

  • What do you call a vampire with no teeth? A gum-bie! 😂
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always late? Count Dra-cool-a!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s afraid of the dark? A night light!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A bat-ty!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A fang-gle!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always complaining? A whine-pire!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting caught? A sneak-bite!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always making jokes? A pun-isher!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always sleeping? A coffin-cuddler!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into fights? A brawler-ina!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always losing his keys? A lock-jaw!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A blood-sucker!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A night-crawler!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into fights? A brawler-ina!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always making jokes? A pun-isher!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always sleeping? A coffin-cuddler!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into fights? A brawler-ina!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always losing his keys? A lock-jaw!
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A blood-sucker!

Ghoulish Gag-a-Thon: Vampire Puns for a Spooktacular Time

  1. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? Count Dra-cula
  2. Why did Dracula take up knitting? To make some blood-curdling scarves.
  3. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mime? A silent night!
  4. Why are vampires so bad at dancing? Because they always have two left feet.
  5. What’s a vampire’s favorite drink? Bloody Marys! 🎃
  6. Why did the vampire get lost? Because he didn’t have a bat-tery!
  7. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A fang-tastic criminal.
  8. What do you call a vampire who’s a great cook? A bat-chef!
  9. Why did the vampire go to the doctor? Because he was feeling bat-ty.
  10. What’s a vampire’s favorite way to travel? By hearse!
  11. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman? Frostbite!
  12. Why did the vampire join the choir? Because he wanted to sing the blood-ies.
  13. What’s a vampire’s favorite movie? Count Dracula.
  14. What do you call a vampire who’s always making puns? A fang-tastic comedian.
  15. What’s a vampire’s favorite type of music? Fang-k.
  16. Why did the vampire get a job at the bank? To get his blood money. 🧛‍♂️
  17. What’s a vampire’s favorite food? Steak with a side of garlic bread.
  18. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A pain in the neck.
  19. Why are vampires so good at playing hide-and-seek? Because they’re great at counting to bat!
  20. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the go? A blood-sucking jet-setter.

Fangs for the Memories: Vampire Puns that Leave a Lasting Impression

  1. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A fang-tastic criminal.
  2. Why did the vampire cross the road? To get to the blood bank.
  3. What do you call a vampire who’s always behind on his payments? A deadbeat.
  4. Why did the vampire get lost in the woods? Because he couldn’t find his fang-dammit!
  5. What do you call a vampire who’s always complaining? A whiner.
  6. Why are vampires such good dancers? Because they’re always in a trance.
  7. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the go? A bat-ty.
  8. Why did the vampire get a job as a butcher? Because he wanted to make some extra necks. 🧛‍♂️
  9. What do you call a vampire who’s always up for a challenge? A fang-tastic adventurer.
  10. Why did the vampire get fired from his job at the restaurant? Because he kept serving blood instead of wine.
  11. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? A drac-ula.
  12. Why are vampires such good gardeners? Because they have a lot of patience.
  13. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting caught? A bat-tle scarred.
  14. Why did the vampire get a pet bat? Because he wanted a little companion. 🦇
  15. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into accidents? A crash-test dummy.
  16. Why are vampires such bad poker players? Because they always have a stake in the game.
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A bite-sized criminal.
  18. Why did the vampire get a job as a dentist? Because he wanted to make some extra fangs.
  19. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A bat-tle botched.
  20. Why are vampires such good detectives? Because they’re always on the lookout for blood.
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Biting Witticisms: Vampire Puns that Hit the Mark

  1. Dracula’s favorite cocktail? A Bloody Mary, of corpse!
  2. What do you call a vampire with no teeth? A gummer!
  3. Why did the vampire get a loan? To buy a blood bank!
  4. What do you call a vampire’s dentures? Fangs for the memories!
  5. Why are vampire jokes so cheesy? Because they’re all gouda!
  6. What do you call a vampire who loves to dance? A fang-tastic dancer!
  7. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the lookout for a bite? A bat-chelor!
  8. Why did the vampire get lost? Because he didn’t have any bat-tery!
  9. What do you call a vampire with a bad singing voice? A howl-o-ween vocalist!
  10. Why did the vampire cross the road? To get to the other blood bank!
    🤣11. What do you call a vampire that’s always broke? A cheapstake!
  11. Why did the vampire get a library card? To check out some bat-fiction!
  12. What do you call a vampire who’s always telling jokes? A pun-isher!
  13. Why did the vampire get in trouble with the law? Because he was caught biting in public!
  14. What do you call a vampire who’s afraid of the dark? A day-walker!
  15. Why did the vampire join a choir? Because he wanted to hear himself sing!
    🧛‍♂️17. What do you call a vampire who’s always studying? A fang-tastic student!
  16. Why did the vampire get banned from the casino? Because he kept hitting on the blackjack dealer!
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always thirsty? A blood-thirsty bully!
  18. Why don’t vampires like the sun? Because it’s not their cup of tea!

Thrillingly Punny: Vampire Jokes that Will Make You Quack

  1. What do you call a vampire who only drinks fruit punch? A grape expectorant!
  2. Why did the vampire avoid the mirror? He didn’t want to see his re-flec-tion.
  3. What do you call a vampire who’s always hungry? A bloodhound.
  4. Why did the vampire get lost in the mall? They were looking for the bat-hrooms.
  5. What do you call a vampire who’s always broke? A deadbeat!
  6. What does a vampire do when they’re cold? They cuddle up in a coffin.
  7. Why are vampires so bad at math? Because they always get to the root of the problem.
  8. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A fang-banger.
  9. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a magician? A vanishing act.
  10. Why did the vampire cross the road? To get to the other coffin.
  11. What do you call a vampire who’s always late? Count Tardula.
  12. What do you call a vampire who’s always thirsty? A sanguine soul.
  13. Why are vampires so good at basketball? Because they have a lot of bounce!
  14. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A batty boy.
  15. What do you call a vampire who works out a lot? A buff bloodsucker.
  16. Why did the vampire start a band? Because he wanted to be the lead singer.
  17. What do you call a vampire who’s always on the go? A jet-set ghoul.
  18. What do you call a vampire who’s always getting cavities? A fang dentist.
  19. What do you call a vampire who’s always singing? A bat-a-roo.
  20. What do you call a vampire who’s always doing magic tricks? A Dracula Houdini.

Captivating Capers: Vampire Puns That Will Enchant You

  • What do you call a vampire who’s always complaining? A bit of a whiner. 💀
  • What do you get when you cross a vampire with a scarecrow? A stalk-er! 🌾🧛‍♂️
  • Why did the vampire get kicked out of the bar? Because he kept ordering Bloody Marys. 🩸🍹
  • What’s a vampire’s favorite food? Steak! 🥩🧛‍♂️
  • Why did the vampire get lost in the mall? He kept getting sidetracked by all the blood banks. 🩸🛒
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always up for a fight? A blood-thirsty brawler. 🧛‍♂️🥊
  • What do vampires use to write with? Bat pens! 🦇🖊️
  • Why did the vampire become a lawyer? To sue the people who stole his blood. 🧛‍♂️⚖️
  • What do you call a vampire who loves to dance? A fang-tastic dancer! 🪩🧛‍♂️
  • Why did the vampire go to the doctor? He had a bat cold! 🦇🤧
  • How do vampires say goodbye? Fang you for everything! 🦷🧛‍♂️
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always on the lookout for new victims? A blood-seeker! 🧛‍♂️🎯
  • Why did the vampire get a job as a security guard? Because he was always on the night shift. 🦇🛡️
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always late? A blood-sucking procrastinator. 🩸🧛‍♂️⏰
  • Why did the vampire go to the hardware store? To buy a new set of fangs. 🧛‍♂️🧰
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting lost? A blood-thirsty wanderer. 🩸🧛‍♂️🗺️
  • Why did the vampire get a tattoo? To make a permanent mark. 💉🧛‍♂️
  • What do you call a vampire who’s always getting into trouble? A bat-shit crazy vampire. 🦇🧛‍♂️🤯
  • Why did the vampire go to the dentist? To get his fangs fixed! 🦷🧛‍♂️

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