160+ Abortion Puns: For When You Want to Laugh Instead of Cry!

Are you ready to dive into the world of abortion puns? Brace yourself for a whirlwind of wit and humor that will leave you laughing out loud. In this blog post, we’ll embark on a comedic exploration of abortion, tackling controversial issues with a dash of laughter.Whether you’re pro-choice or pro-life, prepare to be entertained by puns that will tickle your funny bone and challenge your perspectives. We’ll delve into the often taboo topic of abortion, using humor as a tool to spark dialogue and promote understanding.Buckle up for a wild ride of puns, one-liners, and comedic anecdotes that will shed a whole new light on abortion. Join us as we navigate the complexities of this sensitive issue with laughter, breaking down barriers and fostering a more open and inclusive conversation.

Abortion Quandaries: A Comedic Exploration

1. What do you call a fetus that can’t make up its mind? An abortion quandary.
2. Why did the aborted fetus go to the library? To check out some pro-life books. 🤰
3. What do you call an abortion clinic that only does abortions on Tuesdays? A TWOsday.
4. What’s the difference between a fetus and a pregnant woman? About nine months.
5. Why did the fetus get a speeding ticket? For going over the Cervix Limit.
6. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A delinquent embryo.
7. What do you call a fetus that’s always late? A tardy embryo. 👶
8. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always smiling? A happy fetus. 😊
9. What do you call a fetus that’s always hungry? A hungry fetus. 🍔
10. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always sleepy? A tired fetus. 🥱
11. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always throwing up? A sick fetus. 🤮
12. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always kicking? A feisty fetus. 🦵
13. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always crying? A whiny fetus. 👶🍼
14. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always hiccuping? A hiccupy fetus.
15. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always making faces? A silly fetus. 🤪
16. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always yawning? A sleepy fetus. 😴
17. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always burping? A gassy fetus. 💨
18. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always farting? A smelly fetus. 💨
19. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always dancing? A groovy fetus. 🕺
20. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always singing? A melody fetus. 🎶

Abortions: The Ultimate Punchline

1. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted? A “pro-choice”
2. Why did the fetus get an abortion? Because it didn’t want to be a burden on its parents.
3. What do you call an abortion that’s gone wrong? A “post-birth abortion.”
4. What’s the difference between a fetus and a newborn baby? One is a burden on its parents.
5. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s had an abortion? A “post-term mother.”
6. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then flushed down the toilet? A “waterboard baby.”
7. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then burned? A “holocaust baby.”
8. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then eaten? A “cannibal baby.”
9. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then turned into a lamp? A “baby lamp.”
10. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then used as a science experiment? A “fetus experiment.”
11. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then flushed down the toilet with a box of tampons? 🩸A “feminine hygiene product.”
12. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted at 38 weeks? A “premature baby.”
13. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then brought back to life? A “miracle baby.”
14. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted but instead of being flushed down the toilet, is kept in a jar? A “fetus in a jar.”
15. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted but instead of being flushed down the toilet, is frozen? A “frozen fetus.”
16. What do you call an abortion that’s been done by a doctor who doesn’t have a medical license? A “back-alley abortion.”
17. What do you call an abortion that’s been done by a woman who’s not pregnant? A “fake abortion.”
18. What do you call an abortion that’s been done by a man? A “sex-selective abortion.”
19. What do you call an abortion that’s been done on a woman who’s been raped? A “rape-related abortion.”
20. What do you call an abortion that’s been done on a woman who’s been impregnated by her father? An “incest-related abortion.”

Womb-derful One-Liners: Abortion Puns Galore

1. What do you call a baby that’s born during an abortion? A mis-carriage.
2. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other cervix.
3. What do you call a baby that’s aborted at 25 weeks? A viable alternative.
4. What do you call a woman who has an abortion? A mother by choice.
5. What do you call a baby that’s aborted for medical reasons? A necessity.
6. What’s the difference between a fetus and a tumor? One’s a potential life, the other’s a potential death.
7. What do you call a lazy fetus? A pro-lifer.
8. Why did the fetus get a job at the abortion clinic? To get a head start in life.
9. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then frozen? A popsicle for hell.
10. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then put in a jar? A specimen for debate.

Fetal Follies: Abortion Humor That Hits the Spot

1. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other cervix.
2. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A pro-abort-quem. 👶
3. Why did the pregnant woman go to the hardware store? To buy a baby hammer. 🤰🛠️
4. What do you call a lazy fetus? A pro-crash-tinator. 😴
5. Why did the fetus get a speeding ticket? For driving in the womb lane. 🚗💨
6. What do you call a fetus that’s always arguing with its parents? A contr-abortionist. 🗣️🚫
7. Why did the fetus go to the doctor? Because it had a premature ejaculation. 🤒
8. What do you call a fetus that’s always wearing a hat? A beanie-baby. 👶🧢
9. Why did the fetus get a haircut? Because it wanted to change its parting ways. ✂️🤷‍♂️
10. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting lost? A womp-fetus. 🌎🤷‍♂️
11. Why did the fetus get arrested? For breaking curfew. 🚓
12. What do you call a fetus that’s always playing tricks? A yolk-er. 🥚🤷‍♂️
13. Why did the fetus get baptized? Because it wanted to wash away its original sin. 👼
14. What do you call a fetus that’s always singing? A vocal-fetus. 🎤👶
15. Why did the fetus get a job? To make fetus money. 💰👶
16. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A fetal delinquent. 👮‍♂️🚫
17. Why did the fetus get a tutor? Because it wanted to learn how to multiply. 🧮👶
18. What do you call a fetus that’s always making funny faces? A fetal comedian. 🎭👶
19. Why did the fetus get a library card? To check out some baby books. 📚👶
20. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting wet? A hy-fetus. 🌊👶

Abortion Jokes: The Right to Laugh

1. What do you call a baby that’s born during an abortion? A fetus deletus.
2. Why did the woman get an abortion? Because she didn’t want to be a mother of invention.
3. What’s the difference between an abortion and a miscarriage? About 9 months. 👶
4. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other ovary. 🐔
5. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted? A free-range chicken. 🐔
6. Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she couldn’t bear the thought of raising a child with her husband’s looks. 👶🐔
7. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then put back in the womb? A boomerang baby. ↩️
8. Why did the woman get an abortion? Because she wanted to start her life over again…in the womb.
9. What’s the difference between an abortion and a C-section? About 20 minutes. ⏰
10. Why did the fetus get lost? Because it didn’t have a map to the placenta. 🗺️
11. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then put back in the womb? A do-over baby.
12. Why did the woman get an abortion? Because she didn’t want to be a mother of convenience.
13. What’s the difference between an abortion and a miscarriage? About 2 weeks. 🗓️
14. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other oocyte.
15. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then put back in the womb? A boomerang baby. ↩️
16. Why did the woman get an abortion? Because she wanted to start her life over again…in the womb.
17. What’s the difference between an abortion and a C-section? About 20 minutes. ⏰
18. Why did the fetus get lost? Because it didn’t have a map to the placenta. 🗺️
19. What do you call a fetus that’s been aborted and then put back in the womb? A do-over baby.
20. Why did the woman get an abortion? Because she didn’t want to be a mother of convenience.

Puns for the Terminationally Ill: Abortion Comedy

1. What do you call a fetus that can’t swim? A miscarriage.
2. Why did the embryo quit the band? It couldn’t hold a note.
3. What do you get when you cross a uterus and a lawyer? A dilation case.
4. Why did the fetus go to the doctor? It was having a miscarriage of justice.
5. What do you call a fetus that’s always breaking the law? A delinquent infant.
6. Why did the fetus join the rebel alliance? To fight for its placenta-ry rights.
7. What do you get when you cross a pregnant woman and a bull? A “moo-ternal” disaster.
8. Why did the fetus get lost in the hospital? It didn’t know its way around the uterus.
9. What do you call a fetus that’s always on vacation? A beachcomber. 🏖
10. Why did the fetus need a loan? It was behind on its placenta-ments.
11. What do you get when you cross a uterus and a pick-up truck? A “uter-truck” full of babies.
12. Why did the fetus get a divorce? It couldn’t stand its mother’s umbilical cord.
13. What do you call a fetus that’s always in trouble? A rebel without a uterus.
14. Why did the fetus get a tattoo? To show off its “uter-tude.”
15. What do you call a fetus that’s a big fan of the blues? An embry-blues enthusiast.
16. Why did the fetus get a smartphone? To text its friends from the womb.📱
17. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into fights? A pugilistic preemie.
18. Why did the fetus go to the casino? To try its luck at the “egg-cited” slot machines.
19. What do you call a fetus that’s always on the go? A “womb-der” kid.
20. Why did the fetus get a traffic ticket? It was driving in the “placenta-lane.”

Abortions: A Laff Riot Waiting to Happen

1. Ultrasound technology has made it possible to see fetuses in the womb. Now, if we could only figure out how to get them out without an abortion. 🤦‍♀️
2. What do you call an abortionist who’s always late? Dr. Fetus Deletus! 🤰🤦‍♂️
3. What do you call a baby that’s aborted after 24 weeks? A late-term fetus. 👶⌛
4. What do you call a woman who has an abortion at 9 months? A mother. 🤰💔
5. What do you call a pro-life advocate who’s also a doctor? A hypocrite. 🤦‍♂️
6. What do you call a pro-choice advocate who’s also a doctor? A realist. 💁‍♂️
7. What’s the difference between a pro-life advocate and a pro-choice advocate? A pro-life advocate believes that life begins at conception, while a pro-choice advocate believes that life begins at birth. 👶🤷‍♀️
8. What’s the difference between an abortion and a miscarriage? An abortion is a choice, while a miscarriage is a tragedy. 🤰💔
9. What’s the difference between a fetus and a baby? A fetus is a potential life, while a baby is a living person. 👶🏻🤷‍♀️
10. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a woman’s right to choose. ✊🤰
11. What’s the most common reason women get abortions? They don’t want to be pregnant. 🚫🤰
12. What’s the safest way to get an abortion? Through a licensed abortion provider. ⚕️
13. What’s the most important thing to do after an abortion? Talk to someone you trust. 🗣️🤰
14. What’s the best way to prevent abortion? Comprehensive sex education. 📚
15. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a medical procedure, not a moral issue. ⚕️⚖️
16. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a woman’s right to choose. 💪👩
17. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a safe and legal medical procedure. ⚕️⚖️
18. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a woman’s right to choose. 💪👩
19. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a medical procedure that should be accessible to all women. 🤰⚕️
20. What’s the most important thing to remember about abortion? It’s a safe and legal medical procedure. ⚕️⚖️

Utero-puns: The Funniest Abortion Jokes You’ll Ever Hear

1. Why did the fetus get lost? Because it had a placental abruption! 😄
2. What do you call an abortion that’s too late? A post-term termination.
3. Why did the pregnant woman cross the road? To get to the other cervix.
4. What do you call a fetus that’s always crying? A whiny womb.
5. What do you call an abortion that’s performed with a vacuum cleaner? A suction termination.
6. Why did the fetus get a detention? For being an embryo-nated. 💁‍♀️
7. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a dead fetus? A post-mortem abortion.
8. Why did the fetus get a speeding ticket? For going through the cervix too fast.
9. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a horse? An equestrian abortion. 🐎
10. Why did the fetus get a divorce? Because it found out its father was a sperm donor.
11. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a woman who’s already had five children? A six-pack abortion. 🍼
12. Why did the fetus get a tattoo? To show off its umb-itch-al cord.
13. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a woman who’s really tall? A high-altitude abortion.
14. Why did the fetus get a job as a clown? To make fetuses laugh. 🤡
15. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a woman who’s really hairy? A werewolf abortion.
16. Why did the fetus get a traffic ticket? For driving under the influence of amniotic fluid. 🚔
17. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a woman who’s really fat? A whale of an abortion. 🐳
18. Why did the fetus get a restraining order? To keep its father away from the uterus.
19. What do you call an abortion that’s performed on a woman who’s really old? A vintage abortion. ⌛
20. Why did the fetus get a lottery ticket? To win a uterus of its dreams. ✨

Abortion Humor: Where Laughter Meets Termination

1. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always laughing? A fetus joke-us!😂
2. Why did the pregnant woman get a traffic ticket? Because she was carrying a fetus with an expired sticker.
3. What do you call a baby that’s born with a sense of humor? A pun-derful delivery.
4. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other womb.😂
5. What do you call a baby that’s always telling jokes? A pun-der achiever.
6. What’s the difference between a fetus and a joke? One gets aborted, the other gets delivered.
7. Why did the fetus get a PhD? Because it had a bright future.😆
8. What do you call a baby that’s always making you smile? A pun-derful child.
9. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A cheeky embryo.
10. What do you call a fetus that’s always singing? A pun-derful vocalist.
11. What do you call a fetus that’s always making faces? A pun-derful mime.
12. What do you call a fetus that’s always taking risks? A pun-derful daredevil.
13. What do you call a fetus that’s always making puns? A pun-derful comedian.
14. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting lost? A pun-derful wanderer.
15. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A pun-derful delinquent.
16. What do you call a fetus that’s always making excuses? A pun-derful fibber.
17. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting sick? A pun-derful hypochondriac.
18. What do you call a fetus that’s always sleeping? A pun-derful narcoleptic.
19. What do you call a fetus that’s always eating? A pun-derful glutton.
20. What do you call a fetus that’s always dancing? A pun-derful ballerina.

Pregnant Puns: When Abortion Jokes Go Viral

1. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always making jokes? A pun-dit.
2. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always late? A pro-crastinator.
3. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always losing her keys? A scatterbrain. 🤰
4. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always getting sick? A nauseous Nelly.
5. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always eating? A bun in the oven. 🤰
6. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always complaining? A whiner.
7. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always getting into trouble? A pregnant pause.
8. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always making a fuss? A drama queen.
9. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always getting into fights? A baby-faced brawler. 🤰
10. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always on the go? A mobile mom.
11. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always taking pictures? A mommy-to-be selfie queen. 🤰
12. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always losing her glasses? A scatterbrain.
13. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always making mistakes? A whoopsie daisy.
14. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always getting into accidents? A clumsy gravida.
15. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always making excuses? A verbal evader.
16. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always getting lost? A lost sheep. 🐑
17. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always sleeping? A sleepyhead.
18. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always crying? A waterworks wonder.
19. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always laughing? A giggling mama. 🤣
20. What do you call a pregnant woman who’s always gossiping? A chatterbox.

Abortion One-Liners: The Ultimate Comic Relief

1. What do you call an abortion clinic with a bad reputation? A “Womb for Improvement” 😂
2. Why did the fetus need a lawyer? It was charged with trespassing. 👶
3. What do you get when you cross a fetus with a lawyer? A “womb-at-law.” 👨‍⚖️
4. Why did the fetus get a job at the butcher shop? To learn how to cut the cord. 🔪
5. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always smiling? A “fetus deletus.” 😀
6. Why was the fetus so happy to go to the doctor? Because it was time for its ultra-sound. 🎵
7. What do you call an abortion clinic that’s always booked? A “pro-choice hotspot.” 📱
8. Why did the fetus get a traffic ticket? For driving in the womb lane. 🚓
9. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always in trouble? A “fetus interruptus.” 😈
10. Why did the fetus get lost? Because it didn’t know its placenta. 🗺️
11. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always cold? A “fetus frigidus.” 🥶
12. Why did the fetus go to the casino? To try its luck at the “womb-o-lotto.” 🎰
13. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always singing? A “fetus chorus.” 🎤
14. Why did the fetus get a PhD? Because it was a “fetus of knowledge.” 🎓
15. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always watching TV? A “fetus in utero.” 📺
16. Why did the fetus get a tattoo? To show off its “womb-derful” body art. 🎨
17. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always getting into fights? A “fetus belligerent.” 💢
18. Why did the fetus become a politician? Because it had a bright “uterus” for the future. 🇺🇸
19. What do you call an unborn baby that’s always on the move? A “fetus mobile.” 📱
20. Why did the fetus get arrested? Because it was caught “uterus-ing” possession. 🚔

Fetal Comedy: Abortion Jokes That Will Make You Squirm

1. What do you call a baby that’s too big for its crib? A preemie!
2. Why did the fetus get lost? Because it didn’t have a placenta!
3. What do you call a fetus that’s stuck in the womb? A uterine resident!
4. What do you call a baby that’s born with a tail? A tailender!
5. What do you call a baby that’s born with a mustache? A “moo-stache!” 😇
6. What do you call a baby that’s born with a unibrow? A mono-brow-ey!
7. What do you call a baby that’s born with a full head of hair? A hairy-head!
8. What do you call a baby that’s born with no legs? A leg-less!
9. What do you call a baby that’s born with no arms? An arm-less!
10. What do you call a baby that’s born with no eyes? A blind-side! 🙈
11. What do you call a baby that’s born with no ears? A deaf-inite!
12. What do you call a baby that’s born with no mouth? A mute-ant!
13. What do you call a baby that’s born with no nose? A no-show!
14. What do you call a baby that’s born with no genitals? A neuter! 😄
15. What do you call a baby that’s born with no brain? A dummy!
16. What do you call a baby that’s born with no heart? A heartbreak!
17. What do you call a baby that’s born with no spine? A spineless!
18. What do you call a baby that’s born with no eyebrows? A brow-less!
19. What do you call a baby that’s born with no eyelashes? A lash-less!
20. What do you call a baby that’s born with no fingernails? A nail-less!

Abortion Antics: Puns That Will Leave You in Stitches

1. What do you call a fetus that’s always crying? A womb-an!
2. Why did the fetus get lost? Because it couldn’t find its cord-inate!
3. What’s the difference between a fetus and a baby? A fetus is a potential human, and a baby is a human potential!
4. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other womb-an!
5. What do you call a fetus that’s always on the go? A hyper-fetus!
6. What’s the difference between a fetus and a fruit? One has a peel, and the other has a personality! 🤰
7. Why did the fetus get arrested? Because it was caught with an un-due date! 😂
8. What do you call a fetus that’s always sleeping? A dormant-us!
9. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A fetal-risk!
10. What do you call a fetus that’s always smiling? A happy-fetus! 🙂
11. What do you call a fetus that’s always on the phone? A chatty-fetus!
12. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting sick? A buggy-fetus!
13. What do you call a fetus that’s always late? A tardy-fetus!
14. What do you call a fetus that’s always hungry? A hungry-fetus!
15. What do you call a fetus that’s always thirsty? A thirsty-fetus!
16. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting its diaper changed? A spoiled-fetus! 👶
17. What do you call a fetus that’s always counting its fingers and toes? A numer-fetus!
18. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into fights? A feisty-fetus!
19. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into accidents? A clumsy-fetus!
20. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting its clothes dirty? A messy-fetus!

Reproductive Rights Comedy: Abortion Jokes That Break the Ice

1. Why did the fetus get an abortion? Because it didn’t want to be a preemie 🐣
2. What do you call an abortion that’s too late? A post-natal 😂😂
3. Why was the abortion clinic so busy? Because it was the hot spot for unplanned parenthood 😂
4. What do you call an abortion that’s performed in a parking lot? A drive-thru delivery 🚗
5. Why did the fetus cross the road? To get to the other ovary 🚸
6. What do you get when you cross a uterus with a vacuum cleaner? An abortion in progress 😂
7. Why did the pregnant woman get a speeding ticket? Because she was carrying a fetus in progress 🚨
8. What do you call a woman who has an abortion every day? A serial killer 🔪
9. Why did the fetus get a job at the grocery store? Because it wanted to be in the produce section 🛒
10. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into trouble? A premature delinquent 😈
11. Why did the fetus join a choir? Because it wanted to sing “Abortion on my mind” 🎶
12. What do you call a fetus that’s always laughing? A joke-us 🤡
13. Why did the fetus go to the doctor? Because it had a premature ejaculation 🍆
14. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting lost? A wandering womb 🗺️
15. Why did the fetus get a tattoo? Because it wanted to mark its territory 💉
16. What do you call a fetus that’s always on time? A punctual preemie ⏰
17. Why did the fetus get a job as a lifeguard? Because it wanted to save lives 🌊
18. What do you call a fetus that’s always getting into fights? A karate fetus 👊
19. Why did the fetus get a job as a lawyer? Because it wanted to plead the Fifth ⚖️
20. What do you call a fetus that’s always making faces? A funny fetus 😅

Bruna Silva

Advogada| Cível| Contencioso| Consumidor| Saúde Suplementar