120+ Doctor Puns That’ll Make You Feel Better Instantly!

“What do you call a doctor who loves to make puns?
A MEDicINE-ster of comedy!”

If you work in the medical field, chances are you’ve heard your fair share of doctor puns. They’re a staple of medical humor, and they can be a great way to lighten the mood in a stressful environment.

But even if you’re not a doctor, you can still appreciate a good doctor pun. After all, who doesn’t love a good laugh?

In this blog post, we’ve compiled a list of some of the best doctor puns out there. We’ve got everything from groan-worthy puns to clever puns that will make you laugh out loud.

So whether you’re a doctor looking for a way to make your patients smile, or you’re just someone who loves a good pun, we’ve got you covered. Read on for some of the funniest doctor puns you’ll ever hear.

You might be wondering why we’re talking about doctor puns. Well, there are a few reasons. First of all, doctor puns are just plain funny. They’re a great way to make people laugh, even if they’re not in the medical field. Second, doctor puns can help to reduce stress. When you’re feeling stressed, laughing can help to relax you and improve your mood. And finally, doctor puns can help to build camaraderie. When you share a laugh with someone, it can help to build a connection and make you feel closer to them.

So if you’re looking for a way to make people laugh, reduce stress, or build camaraderie, doctor puns are a great option. And with our list of the best doctor puns, you’re sure to find one that will make you smile.

Pun-derful Medical Puns That Will Make You LOL

1. What do you call a doctor who makes terrible jokes? A pun-isher.
2. Why did the surgeon get lost? Because he didn’t have his map to the heart. 💉
3. What did the patient say to the doctor who couldn’t stop cracking jokes? “I need a sedative!” 😴
4. How did the nurse get her report to the doctor on time? She used a hypodermic needle. 💉
5. What do you call a surgery that leaves you in stitches? A suture-day. stitches
6. Why are skeletons such bad dancers? They have no “body” to move. 💀
7. What do you call a doctor who steals your heart? A cardiologist-in-crime. 💔
8. How do you fix a cracked tooth? With a little filling. 🦷
9. What does a dentist call an X-ray of a mouth full of cavities? A chew-ography. 🦷
10. Why did the nurse put the stethoscope around the patient’s wrist? To hear his arteries. 🩺
11. What do you call a doctor who delivers babies on wheels? A midwife-cycle. 🚲
12. Why did the doctor order a bloodbath? Because the patient was having a hemorrhage. 🩸
13. What do you call a doctor who always has a cold? A sinus-doctor. 🤧
14. Why did the patient cancel their appointment with the cardiologist? Because they couldn’t stomach his jokes. 🧊
15. What do you call a doctor who specializes in brain surgery? A head-shrinker. 🧠
16. Why was the doctor so nervous about his first surgery? Because he was afraid of making a boo-boo. 👻
17. What do you call a nurse who’s always on the phone? A tele-nurse. 📞
18. Why did the doctor keep a first-aid kit in his car? To help with car-diac arrest. 🚑
19. What do you call a doctor who’s always telling jokes? A com-medic. 🎭
20. How do you know when a surgeon is having a bad day? When they’re not in a sut-able mood. 💢

The Ultimate Guide to Doctor Jokes: Laugh All Day Long

1. What do you call a doctor who’s always late? A tar-doc!
2. Why was the doctor’s stethoscope broken? Because he had a heart murmur!
3. What do you call a lazy doctor? A pill-ower! 💊
4. Why did the doctor join a band? To play the bone-afied!
5. What did the doctor say to the patient with a broken leg? “Don’t bone about it!”
6. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other…sick side!
7. What do you call a doctor who loves to dance? A hip-ocrates! 💃
8. Why did the doctor order a pizza? He wanted a second opinion!
9. What do you call a doctor who’s a bit of a klutz? A fumble-ologist! 🤕
10. Why did the doctor get lost? Because he had a poor-gnosis! ❓
11. What do you call a doctor who’s a bit of a comedian? A pun-ologist!
12. Why did the doctor order a pizza with anchovies? Because he wanted to make a fin-al diagnosis! 🍕
13. What do you call a doctor who’s a bit of a drama queen? A stage-five-itis! 🎭
14. Why did the doctor get a parking ticket? Because he took up too much medical space! 🚗
15. What do you call a doctor who’s a bit of a fashionista? A gown-and-out! 👗
16. Why did the doctor get a divorce? Because he couldn’t stand the side e-fects! 👩‍⚕️
17. What do you call a doctor who’s a bit of a loudmouth? A big-mouth-ologist! 🗣️
18. Why did the doctor order an MRI? Because he wanted to get a head scan! 🧠
19. What do you call a doctor who’s a bit of a klutz? A fumble-ologist! 🤕
20. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other…sick side!

Doctor Puns So Bad They’re Actually Good

1. What do you call a doctor who makes really bad puns? A com-EDian!
2. What do you call a doctor who is always getting lost? A GPS doc!
3. What do you call a doctor who is always trying to save money? A budget cut-throat! 😷
4. What do you call a doctor who is always on call? A phone-a-doc!
5. What do you call a doctor who is always late? A clock-blocker!
6. What do you call a doctor who is always giving out freebies? A sampler-doctor!
7. What do you call a doctor who is always gossiping? A spill-the-beans doc!
8. What do you call a doctor who is always making mistakes? A boo-boo doc!
9. What do you call a doctor who is always telling jokes? A pun-ishment! 😂
10. What do you call a doctor who is always snoring? A slumber-doc!
11. What do you call a doctor who is always taking breaks? A pause-doc!
12. What do you call a doctor who is always getting into trouble? A malpractice-maker!
13. What do you call a doctor who is always taking naps? A cat-nap doc! 😴
14. What do you call a doctor who is always making up stories? A tall-tale doc!
15. What do you call a doctor who is always laughing? A giggler-doc!
16. What do you call a doctor who is always giving out candy? A sugar-coated doc!
17. What do you call a doctor who is always getting lost? A maze-ing doc!
18. What do you call a doctor who is always making people laugh? A knee-slapper doc! 😂
19. What do you call a doctor who is always taking things too seriously? A stick-in-the-mud doc!
20. What do you call a doctor who is always making people feel better? A healing hero!

Rx for Laughter: Doctor Puns to Cure Your Blues

1. What do you call a physician who’s always telling jokes? A pun-doc-tor! 👨‍⚕️
2. Why did the patient get lost in the hospital? Because they followed the signs for “ICU”! 😅
3. What do you call a doctor who’s always prescribing laughter? A prescrip-pun-tionist! 💊😂
4. Why did the doctor cross the playground? To get to the other slide! 🛝
5. What’s a doctor’s favorite type of music? Hip-hop-pocracy! 🎵🩺
6. Why did the X-ray technician get fired? Because he kept taking funny bones! 🩻📸
7. What do you call a doctor who loves to bowl? A strike-ologist! 🎳⚕️
8. Why did the nurse get a speeding ticket? Because she was driving in the “fast lane” of the hospital! 🚨👩‍⚕️
9. What’s the difference between a doctor and a musician? Doctors play with lives, musicians play with notes! 🎶👨‍⚕️
10. Why did the doctor order a pizza? Because he wanted a “slice” of life! 🍕⚕️
11. What do you call a doctor who’s always late for appointments? A pro-crastin-doc-tor! ⏰
12. Why did the doctor get lost in the grocery store? Because he couldn’t find the “aisle” he was looking for! 🛒😅
13. What’s a doctor’s favorite beverage? A “heart” attack! ☕❤️
14. Why did the patient go to the doctor with a broken pencil? Because it was “writing” wrong! ✏️🤕
15. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting sick? A “hypo-con-doc-triac”! 🤒⚕️
16. Why did the doctor get a speeding ticket? Because he was driving a “stitch” in time! 🚑🚨
17. What’s the difference between a doctor and a lawyer? Doctors save lives, lawyers save money! 💰💼
18. Why did the doctor get a new stethoscope? Because his old one was “hear”ing things! 👂🩺
19. What do you call a doctor who’s always on the go? A “roam”ing doctor! 🏃‍♀️⚕️
20. Why did the patient leave the doctor’s office with a smile? Because the doctor prescribed him a “grin” and bear it! 😁

Clever Doctor Puns That Will Brighten Your Day

1. What do you call a doctor who’s always in a good mood? A hap-py doc.
2. What do you call a doctor who’s always making mistakes? A blunder-buss.
3. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting lost? A misguided missile.
4. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting into trouble? A scalpelgoat.
5. What do you call a doctor who’s always telling jokes? A pun-dit.
6. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving bad news? A diagnosis-disaster.
7. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting into fights? A pug-ilist.
8. What do you call a doctor who’s always losing patients? A drop-out.
9. What do you call a doctor who’s always in a hurry? A flash-in-the-pan.
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving up? A quitter.
11. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people laugh? A comedy surgeon.
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people cry? A weep-on.
13. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people sneeze? A boo-hoo.
14. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people scream? A howler.
15. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people faint? A swooner.
16. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people gag? A wretch.
17. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people vomit? A puker.
18. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people bleed? A cutter.
19. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people itch? A scratcher.
20. What do you call a doctor who’s always making people break out in hives? A rash-maker.

Side-Splitting Doctor Jokes to Tickle Your Funny Bone

1. What do you call a doctor who always cracks jokes? A medi-clown!
2. Why did the surgeon become a musician? Because he had great rhythm in his hands!
3. What do you call a doctor who takes a lot of vacations? A prescription writer! 💉
4. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other hospital!
5. What do you call a doctor who is always late? A procrastin-ating physician!
6. What do you call a doctor who can’t stop telling jokes? A humerus bone specialist!
7. Why did the doctor lose his medical license? Because he was a real quack! 🦆
8. What do you call a doctor who is always in a good mood? A grinning specialist! 😁
9. Why did the doctor get a speeding ticket? Because he was in a hurry to deliver a baby!
10. What do you call a doctor who is always tired? A sleepyhead surgeon! 😴
11. Why did the doctor prescribe a joke a day? Because laughter is the best medicine!
12. What do you call a doctor who is always making mistakes? A blunderbuss!
13. Why did the doctor join a rock band? Because he had great rhythm in his veins! 🎸
14. What do you call a doctor who is always on the go? A jet-setting surgeon! ✈️
15. Why did the doctor get arrested? Because he was trafficking in puns! 🚨
16. What do you call a doctor who is always smiling? A grinning physician! 😊
17. Why did the doctor get a call from the police? Because he was practicing without a license! 👮‍♂️
18. What do you call a doctor who is always making house calls? A roaming physician! 🏠🚗
19. Why did the doctor go to the movies? To see a medical drama! 🎥

Doctor Puns That Will Make Your Patients Smile

1. What do you call a doctor who’s always on the go? A physician on the roam.
2. What do you call a doctor who loves to dance? A hip-hop-ocrates.
3. What do you call a doctor who’s always happy? A doc-tor of joy. 😷
4. What do you call a doctor who’s always singing? A medical-ical.
5. What do you call a doctor who’s always arguing? A contra-doctor-ian.
6. What do you call a doctor who’s always making mistakes? A malpractice-or.
7. What do you call a doctor who’s always late? A tarda-doc.
8. What do you call a doctor who’s always studying? A book-worm-doc.
9. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting into trouble? A medical-maverick.
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always losing their patients? A doc-gone-it.
11. What do you call a doctor who’s always making jokes? A pun-doc-tor.
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always making house calls? A doc-umentary filmmaker.
13. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting lost? A map-a-doc.
14. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting sick? A hypochondriac-doc. 🤒
15. What do you call a doctor who’s always sleeping? A snooze-doc.
16. What do you call a doctor who’s always eating? A gastro-nom-doc.
17. What do you call a doctor who’s always reading? A bibliophile-doc.
18. What do you call a doctor who’s always watching TV? A couch-potato-doc.
19. What do you call a doctor who’s always playing video games? A gamer-doc. 🎮
20. What do you call a doctor who’s always taking selfies? A selfie-doc.

Humorous Doctor Puns That Will Make You Feel Better

1. What do you call a doctor who always makes you laugh? A humor-therapist!
2. Why did the doctor join a band? To get his MD (musical degree)!
3. What do you call a doctor who’s always on the go? A high-pulse practitioner! 🤕
4. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other side of the patient! 😆
5. What do you call a doctor who’s always late for appointments? A pro-crastinator!
6. What’s the difference between a doctor and a car mechanic? One fixes people, the other fixes cars.
7. Why did the doctor order a pizza with extra cheese? Because he wanted a “cheese-y” recovery! 🍕
8. What do you call a doctor who’s always telling jokes? A pun-ishment!
9. Why did the doctor join a choir? To sing “heal-luia”! 🎤
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting lost? A medical GPS-waster!
11. Why did the doctor start a construction company? Because he wanted to build a “bone”-appetite!
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always taking care of sick people? A “get well” specialist!
13. Why did the doctor wear a trench coat? Because he wanted to be a “cold” case specialist!
14. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving lectures? A professor-scrip!
15. Why did the doctor quit his job? Because he was “sick” of working!
16. What do you call a doctor who’s always smiling? A happy-healer! 😊
17. Why did the doctor cross the road twice? To check for any signs of life! 🚑
18. What do you call a doctor who’s always cooking up new treatments? A medical chef!
19. Why did the doctor open a bakery? Because he wanted to “heal” the world with bread!
20. What do you call a doctor who’s always singing in the operating room? A surgeon-singer!

Doctor Jokes That Will Make You Groan and Laugh at the Same Time

1. What do you call a doctor who loves candy? A sweet tooth!
2. Why did the doctor leave the hospital? To get some fresh air!
3. What did the doctor say to the broken pencil? You need a writing prescription!
4. How do you fix a cracked skull? With a bone-afide doctor!
5. Why did the doctor get lost? Because he didn’t take the Hippocratic oath!
6. What do you call a doctor who can’t stop talking? A chatterbox!
7. Why did the doctor prescribe laughing gas? To lighten the mood!
8. What’s the best medicine for a broken heart? A big dose of laughter!
9. Why did the doctor get a pet pig? To have a ham-bulance!
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always on the go? A mobile medic!
11. Why did the doctor wear a stethoscope around his neck? To listen to the sound of silence!
12. What’s the difference between a doctor and a mechanic? One fixes you up, the other fixes you car! 🚗
13. Why did the doctor prescribe a trip to the beach? To cure his patient’s sand-emic!
14. What do you call a doctor who always wears sunglasses? A shades of gray doctor!
15. Why did the doctor get a dinosaur bone? To use it as a thigh-bone!
16. What’s the worst thing about being a doctor? Seeing patients with hypochondri-acts!
17. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other side of the prescription!
18. What do you call a doctor who loves to play cards? A heart surgeon!
19. Why did the doctor wear an apron? To avoid getting “stitched” up!
20. What’s the difference between a good doctor and a great doctor? A good doctor prescribes medicine, a great doctor prescribes laughter! 😂

The Best Doctor Puns That Will Make You a Pro Comedian

1. What do you call a doctor who can’t keep his patients waiting? A pro-crastinator.
2. What do you call a doctor who’s always in a hurry? A rush hour doctor.
3. What do you call a doctor who’s always making mistakes? A malpractice professional.
4. What do you call a doctor who’s really good with kids? A pediatric expert. 🦠
5. What do you call a doctor who’s really good with hands-on procedures? A surgical virtuoso.
6. What do you call a doctor who’s really good with elderly patients? A geezer whisperer.
7. What do you call a doctor who’s great with giving bad news? A proctologist.
8. What do you call a doctor who’s always on the go? Dr. Zoom. 🏃‍♂️
9. What do you call a doctor who’s really good at solving puzzles? A medical detective.
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always laughing? A jokester doc. 😂
11. What do you call a doctor who’s always telling jokes? A medical comedian. 🎭
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting into trouble? A medical mishap maker.
13. What do you call a doctor who’s always on time? Dr. Punctual.
14. What do you call a doctor who’s always forgetting things? Dr. Dory. 🐟
15. What do you call a doctor who’s really bad at his job? A medical malpractice.
16. What do you call a doctor who’s really good at his job? A miracle worker. ✨
17. What do you call a doctor who’s always making house calls? A Dr. Feelgood.
18. What do you call a doctor who’s always taking selfies? Dr. Insta-medic. 🤳
19. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving free advice? A pro-bono physician.
20. What do you call a doctor who’s always making puns? A medical pun-dit.

Witty Doctor Jokes That Will Make You the Life of the Party

1. What do you call a doctor who loves to tell jokes? A comedienne.
2. What do you call a doctor with a bad sense of humor? A groan surgeon.
3. What do you call a doctor who’s always late? A procrastinating physician.
4. What do you call a doctor who’s always on call? A beep doctor.
5. What do you call a doctor who’s always prescribing the same thing? A recipe writer. 😷
6. What do you call a doctor who’s always making house calls? A roaming physician.
7. What do you call a doctor who’s always wearing a stethoscope? A listening post.
8. What do you call a doctor who’s always taking notes? A charting physician.
9. What do you call a doctor who’s always ordering tests? A lab rat.
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting sued? A malpractice magnet.
11. What do you call a doctor who’s always making mistakes? A butcher.
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always telling the truth? A liar.
13. What do you call a doctor who’s always prescribing antibiotics? A pill pusher.
14. What do you call a doctor who’s always making referrals? A networker.
15. What do you call a doctor who’s always working overtime? A workaholic.
16. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting rich? A money doctor. 🤑
17. What do you call a doctor who’s always losing patients? A tomb doctor.
18. What do you call a doctor who’s always taking vacations? A holiday doc.
19. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting sick? A patient doctor.
20. What do you call a doctor who’s always making jokes? A punny doctor. 🤪

Knock-Knock Jokes About Doctors That Will Leave You in Stitches

1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Doctor. Doctor who? Exactly, and you’re the patient!
2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hip. Hip who? Your new hip replacement is here!
3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ouch. Ouch who? My, you have a bad knee! 🧠
4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? I. I who? You’re in need of an IV!
5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mary. Mary who? It doesn’t matter, hurry up, the patient is dying!
6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? I’m sorry, I don’t have any more bones to give you.
7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Howie. Howie who? How I wish I had a healthy liver!
8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Chemist. Chemist who? Chemist be the one to ask for your blood sample?
9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nurse. Nurse who? Nurse you out of your misery! 💉
10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Heart. Heart who? Heart surgery if you don’t answer soon!
11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Surgeon. Surgeon who? Surgeon, come quickly, there’s a patient in here!
12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? X-ray. X-ray who? X-ray is the one who can see right through you!
13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Calcium. Calcium who? Calcium down and relax, you’re in good hands!
14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hospital. Hospital who? Hospital-ity, I hope you’re here to help!
15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Aspirin. Aspirin who? Aspirin the pain away!
16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Patient. Patient who? Patient is in room 104, please proceed.
17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Scalpel. Scalpel who? Scalpel, you feeling better?
18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? MRI. MRI who? MRI me a favor and get me a doctor!
19. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blood. Blood who? Blood test results are back, and they’re great!
20. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Doctor. Doctor who? Doktor derp! 💊

Doctor Puns That Will Make You Want to Call 911 For Laughing Too Hard

1. What do you call a doctor who can’t keep his patients down? A fall-down-ologist! 😂🤣🤣
2. Why did the doctor go to the bank? To make a deposit! 🏦💰
3. What do you call a doctor who is always losing his patients? A doctor-hopper! 🚑🏥
4. Why are doctors so good at telling jokes? Because they’ve got a lot of pa-tience! 😇
5. What do you call a doctor who is always late? A pro-crastin-ator! ⏰🤣
6. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other side of the patient! 🏃‍♂️
7. What do you call a doctor who is always making mistakes? A malpractice artist! 👨‍🎨🖼️
8. Why are doctors so bad at singing? Because they always hit the wrong notes! 🎶🎤
9. What do you call a doctor who is always on call? A doc-on-the-go! 📲💨
10. Why did the doctor get fired from his job? Because he kept making bone-headed mistakes! 🦴
11. What do you call a doctor who is always losing his glasses? A spec-ta-cular! 👓
12. Why did the doctor join a rock band? To head-bang with the rest of the crew! 🤘🎶
13. What do you call a doctor who is always making bad jokes? A pun-isher! 🙄😂
14. Why are doctors so bad at dancing? Because they always have two left feet! 🕺💃
15. What do you call a doctor who is always forgetting things? A memo-ra-D! 🧠📝
16. Why did the doctor get a new stethoscope? Because he needed a heart-felt laugh! ❤️🩺
17. What do you call a doctor who is always making up stories? A fib-ulator! 🤥😂
18. Why are doctors so bad at bowling? Because they always strike out! 🎳
19. What do you call a doctor who is always getting into trouble? A malpractice-maniac! 🤦‍♂️🚓
20. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other side and fix his hip-pop-otamus! 🦛😂

Doctor Jokes That Will Make You Prescribe Yourself a Healthy Dose of Laughter

1. Why did the doctor get lost? Because he didn’t have a HIPPA navigator.
2. What do you call a doctor who always wears a bow tie? A bow-tox doctor.
3. Why did the doctor join a band? To have his own practice.
4. What do you call a doctor who loves to ride horses? A centaur surgeon.
5. Why did the doctor cross the road? To get to the other prescription.
6. What do you call a doctor who’s always on time? A punctual MD.
7. Why did the doctor get a tattoo of a stethoscope? So he could always listen to his patients’ hearts.
8. What do you call a doctor who loves to gamble? A risky business surgeon.
9. Why did the doctor become a vegetarian? Because he couldn’t stomach the thought of surgery!
10. What do you call a doctor who’s always late? A behind-the-times MD.
11. Why did the doctor get a pet parrot? To have a bird’s-eye view of his patients. 😂
12. What do you call a doctor who’s always getting into trouble? A malpractice magnet. 🧲
13. Why did the doctor start a blog? To give his patients a daily dose of humor.
14. What do you call a doctor who’s always giving bad news? A de-motivational speaker.
15. Why did the doctor wear a mask? To protect his patients from his bad jokes.😷
16. What do you call a doctor who’s always making mistakes? A malpractice marvel.
17. Why did the doctor open a restaurant? To serve up his patients some hearty humor.
18. What do you call a doctor who’s always singing? A medical maestro.
19. Why did the doctor join a choir? To spread some vocal relief. 🎶
20. What do you call a doctor who’s always gossiping? A soap opera surgeon.