149+ Cocktail Puns That’ll Leave You Shaken and Stirred with Laughter!

Prepare yourself for a literary cocktail hour like no other, where laughter and libations intertwine in a harmonious dance. In this blog, we’ll embark on an exhilarating journey through the world of cocktail puns, a realm where giggles and garnishes go hand in hand.From the moment you shake or stir your first drink, you’ll be greeted by an array of puns that will tickle your funny bone and tantalize your taste buds. We’ll explore the witty world of mixed drinks, where puns flow as freely as the spirits themselves. You’ll find humor in every glass, from the shaken-not-stirred Bond-inspired quips to the side-splittingly silly wordplay that will turn your happy hour into a full-blown comedy show.But our journey doesn’t stop at cocktails alone. We’ll delve into the world of vintage wines, where puns age like fine wine itself. From sparkling bubbly to barrel-aged whiskey, no spirit is safe from our playful pursuit of puns. Each type of drink offers a unique canvas upon which we’ll paint our punchlines, ensuring that your next cocktail hour is a symphony of laughter and libations.So, whether you’re a seasoned punster or a novice in need of a giggle, join us for a cocktail party filled with humor and hilarity. Our puns are guaranteed to leave you in stitches and make your drinks even more enjoyable. Cheers to the art of cocktail puns – may it forever bring joy to your taste buds and tickle your funny bone with every sip!

Cheers to the Best Cocktail Puns on the Internet

1. What do you call a bartender who’s always late? A slow pour😮‍💨
2. What do you call a cocktail that’s too strong? A knockout punch!🥊
3. Why did the cocktail go to the doctor? It was feeling shaken, not stirred.🤕
4. What do you call a cocktail made with fruit punch and tequila? A tropical smash!🏝️
5. What do you call a bartender who’s always making bad jokes? A pun-dit.😅
6. Why did the martini get lost? Because it didn’t know its olive-way around the bar.🍸
7. What do you call a cocktail that’s so good it’ll make your toes curl? A footsie!🦶
8. What do you call a cocktail that’s so refreshing it’ll make you feel like you’re on a beach? A shore thing!🏖️
9. What do you call a cocktail that’s so strong it’ll make you see double? A vision impairment. 👀
10. What do you call a cocktail that’s so delicious it’ll make you want to dance? A drink to remember!💃🕺
11. What do you call a cocktail that’s so mysterious it’ll make you want to investigate? A Jim Beam me up, Scotty! 🚀
12. What do you call a cocktail that’s so sour it’ll make your face pucker? A lemon-aid stand.🍋
13. What do you call a cocktail that’s so sweet it’ll make your teeth ache? A cavity-creamer.🦷
14. What do you call a cocktail that’s so fizzy it’ll make your head spin? A head-over-heels.😵‍💫
15. What do you call a cocktail that’s so strong it’ll make you want to call a cab? A designated driver.🚕
16. What do you call a cocktail that’s so refreshing it’ll make you want to take a nap? A nightcap.😴
17. What do you call a cocktail that’s so delicious it’ll make you want to cry? A tear-jerker.😢
18. What do you call a cocktail that’s so strong it’ll make you want to scream? A banshee blast.😱
19. What do you call a cocktail that’s so good it’ll make you want to chug it? A bottoms up!🍺
20. What do you call a cocktail that’s so unique it’ll make you want to try it twice? A second helping!🍹

Shaken, Not Stirred: The Wittiest Puns for Your Mixed Drinks

1. Why did the bartender get fired? Because he was always making spirits!
2. What do you call a cocktail made with orange juice and vodka? A screwdriver, of course!
3. Why did the lemon join the band? Because it wanted to be in the lime-light! 🍹
4. What do you call a cocktail made with gin and tonic? A gin and bear it!
5. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs! 🐆
6. What do you call a beer that’s always trying to get into fights? A boxer!🥊
7. Why did the two wines get married? Because they were pear-fect for each other!🍐
8. What do you call a bartender who’s always making mistakes? A mixologist! ⚗️
9. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well! 🍌
10. What do you call a potato with no legs? A tater-tot!

Mixing Humor with a Chaser of Cocktails: Puns to Make You Chuckle

1. Why did the bartender get in trouble? Because he was caught mixing drinks with his fists!
2. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
3. Why did the cocktail have a headache? Because it was a shaken, not stirred martini!
4. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe. 🐝
5. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
6. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
7. Why are colds bad criminals? They’re hard to catch!
8. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
9. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired! 🚲
10. What do you call a lazy egg? A couch potato! 🥔
11. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
12. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
13. Why did the computer get a cold? It had a virus!
14. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
15. Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
16. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time! ⌚
17. Why did the math book look so sad? Because it was full of problems! 📚
18. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐟
19. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired! 💤
20. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🥔

Pour One Out for These Side-Splitting Cocktail Puns

1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
2. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
3. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
4. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
5. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
6. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
7. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
8. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman. ❄️
9. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.
10. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind as a bat in the ocean.
11. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato. 🦘
12. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
13. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
14. What do you call a snowman that knows karate? A snow-blower. ☃️
15. What do you call a cow that can do magic? A moo-gician.
16. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
17. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
18. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
19. What do you call a sheep that can’t stop talking? A baaaaaaa-d joke. 🐑
20. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.

Garnished with Laughter: Hilarious Puns for Your Next Cocktail Hour

1. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
2. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
3. What did the hipster say to the mainstream trend? “Your avocado toast is so last season.” 🍸
4. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
5. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
6. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
7. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field. 🌽
8. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
9. What do you call a fish with no eyes? No can sea.
10. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one. ⛳
11. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
12. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired. 🚲
13. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
14. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
15. How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch. 🎃
16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
17. What did the hipster say to the mainstream trend? “Your avocado toast is so last season.”
18. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
19. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick. 🦘
20. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

On the Rocks with Puns: Puns That Will Make Your Drinks Even Chiller

1. Why did the ice cube get lost? Because it melted away!
2. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman! 🍹
3. Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well! 🧊
4. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
5. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired! ❄️
6. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef! 🥛
7. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
8. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time! 🍸
9. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
10. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
11. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs! 🐧
12. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea! 🧊
13. Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus! ❄️
14. What do you call a bee that can’t decide? A maybe! 🐝
15. Why did the broom go to the barber? To get a new sweep! 🍹
16. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman! 🥛
17. Why did the tree go to the barber? To get its bark cut! 🍸
18. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐧
19. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one! 🧊
20. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! ❄️

A Good Wine List: Top-Notch Puns for Your Favorite Vintages

1. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
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2. Why did the grape get arrested? For grape-ing someone else’s vine.
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3. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
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4. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.
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5. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
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6. Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its back.
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7. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
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8. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
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9. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
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10. What do you call a boomerang that you can’t throw away? A stick.
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11. Why didn’t the bicycle smile? He was twoTIRED.
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12. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
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13. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind? A maybe.
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14. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer.
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15. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
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16. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
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17. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
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18. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.
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19. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one.
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20. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

Let’s Get Fizzical: Bubbling Puns for Your Sparkling Cocktails

1. Why did the champagne bottle get a traffic ticket? It was fizzy and speeding!
2. What do you call a champagne flute that can’t stand up? 🍾 A tipsy flute!
3. Why did the orange juice run away from the champagne? It was afraid it would get fizzed out!
4. How do you make a cocktail fizz? Just add a little soda-liciousness!
5. What do you call a cocktail that’s always bubbling with excitement? A fizz-tastic potion! 🍹
6. Why did the bartender refuse to serve the cola? It was too fizzy-cal!
7. What do you get when you cross a lime with a lemon? A spark-lime fizz-cade! 🍋
8. Why did the fizzy drink steal the show? It was a soda-licious performer!
9. What do you call a cocktail that’s always making you laugh? A fizz-tickler!
10. Why did the soda can get a trophy? Because it was the fizziest of them all! 🏆
11. What do you call a sparkling cocktail that’s out of this world? A fizz-tronaut!
12. Why did the champagne bottle get a traffic ticket? It was fizz-driving!
13. What do you call a cocktail that’s always the life of the party? A fizz-tastic party starter! 🎉
14. Why did the orange juice run away from the champagne? It was afraid it would get fizzed outta here!
15. What do you call a cocktail that’s always on top? A fizz-tastic topper!
16. Why did the bartender get a promotion? Because he was a fizz-tastic mixologist! 👨‍🍳
17. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting into trouble? A fizz-aster!
18. Why did the fizzy drink get a doctor’s appointment? It had a fizz-ical exam!
19. What do you call a cocktail that’s always making you smile? A fizz-tastic grin-ducker!
20. Why did the soda can get a therapist? It needed to talk about its fizz-y issues!

Barrelling with Laughter: Puns for Whiskey Lovers

1. What do you call a whiskey that’s always in a good mood? A “wheely” good time.
2. Why did the whiskey turn down the job at the distillery? Because it was already “barreled” with responsibility.
3. What do you say to a whiskey that’s always spilling? “You’re a bit of a dram-a queen.” 🥃
4. Why did the whiskey get a speeding ticket? Because it was “overproof.”
5. What do you call a whiskey that’s always getting into trouble? A “reckless rye.”
6. What do you say to a whiskey that’s always the life of the party? “You’re a real dram-atic!”
7. Why did the whiskey cross the road? To get to the other “still.”
8. What do you call a whiskey that’s always getting into fights? A “brawling bourbon.”
9. Why did the whiskey get a promotion at the distillery? Because it was always “on the rocks.”
10. What do you say to a whiskey that’s always down on its luck? “Cheer up, you’re not the ‘worst'” whiskey in the world.”
11. Why did the whiskey get a divorce? Because it was always “on the rocks.”
12. What do you call a whiskey that’s always telling jokes? A “pun-derful” whiskey.
13. Why did the whiskey get a new job at the distillery? Because it was “overqualified.”
14. What do you call a whiskey that’s always getting lost? A “wandering whiskey.”
15. Why did the whiskey get a speeding ticket? Because it was “under the influence.”
16. What do you call a whiskey that’s always in a good mood? A “happy-go-lucky” whiskey.
17. Why did the whiskey get a job at the post office? Because it was always “delivering.”
18. What do you call a whiskey that’s always getting into trouble? A “rebellious rye.”
19. Why did the whiskey get a promotion at the distillery? Because it was always “rising to the top.”
20. What do you call a whiskey that’s always getting invited to parties? A “socialite sip.”

Sour Puss or Sweet Treat: Puns for Every Kind of Cocktail

1. What do you call a cocktail that’s always frowning? A sour puss!
2. Why was the martini so upset? It was shaken, not stirred!
3. What do you call a cocktail made with orange juice and vodka? A Screwdriver! 🍹
4. What do you get when you cross a cocktail with a comedian? A pun-tini!
5. Why did the bartender refuse to make a mai tai? Because he didn’t want to be sued for mali-practice!
6. What do you call a cocktail that’s always in a good mood? A sweet treat! 🧁
7. Why was the cocktail so popular? Because it had a great personality!
8. What do you call a cocktail that’s served in a glass slipper? A Cinderella-rita!
9. Why did the martini get lost? Because it couldn’t find its olive! 🫒
10. What do you get when you cross a cocktail with a lawyer? An objection-tini!
11. Why was the cocktail so shy? Because it was a blushing mimosa!
12. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting into trouble? A bad influence! 😉
13. Why did the cocktail get arrested? Because it was driving under the influence!
14. What do you get when you cross a cocktail with a vampire? A blood-orange margarita! 🧛‍♂️
15. Why did the cocktail go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little shaken!
16. What do you call a cocktail that’s always giving advice? A wise-key sour!
17. Why did the cocktail get a divorce? Because it was too bitter! 💔
18. What do you call a cocktail that’s always making jokes? A pun-derful drink!
19. Why did the cocktail get a speeding ticket? Because it was going martini mad! 🚓
20. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting into fights? A belligerent bellini! 🥊

Call Me a Mocktail Master: Puns for Non-Alcoholic Delights

• What do you call a teetotaler’s favorite drink? A mocktail.
• Why did the mocktail get lost? It didn’t know which aisle to turn to.
  🍹- What do you call a virgin daiquiri? A fruit salad.
• Why couldn’t the mocktail make it to the party? It didn’t have any “spirits.”
• What do you call a mocktail that’s always up for a good time? A “fizz”-tive drink.
• Why did the mocktail get a standing ovation? Because it was truly “soda-licious.”
• What do you call a mocktail that’s always in trouble? A “juice”-ticeable offender.
  🍹- What do you call a mocktail that’s always getting into fights? A “punch”-line.
• Why did the mocktail get a bad review? Because it was “flat.”
• What do you call a mocktail that’s always in a good mood? A “bubbly” drink.

Shaken and Punned: Puns for Your Next Happy Hour

1. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh!
2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
3. What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish? Swimming trunks!
4. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea.
5. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
6. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time!
7. Why couldn’t the bike smile? Because it was two tired!
8. What do you call a kangaroo that can’t jump? A pouch potato!
9. Why are colds bad criminals? They’re hard to catch!
10. What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘
11. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
12. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind as a cod.
13. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they’d crack each other up!
14. What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!
15. What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐠
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
17. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back? A stick.
18. Why did the computer go to the chiropractor? It had a byte in its back.
19. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea. 🦌
20. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!

Raising the Spirits with Puns: Hilarious Quips for Your Next Cocktail Party

1. Why did the bartender get arrested? For making a killer cocktail!
2. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fishless.
3. I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered. 👻
4. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
5. A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.
6. I went to the doctor about my broken finger. He said it was a little finger.
7. What do you call a factory that sells passable products? A satisfactory.
8. Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
9. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!
10. Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
11. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. 🦩
12. What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick.
13. I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.
14. What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Philippe Flop.
15. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
16. A man walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia. The librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
17. My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So I finished my cheesecake.
18. What do you call a kangaroo that can’t jump? A pouch potato.
19. Why did the math book look so sad? Because of all of its problems!
20. What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time.

Mixing and Mashing Puns: Puns That Combine Cocktails with Other Jokes

1. What do you call a bartender who hates his job? A shak-er
2. Why did the martini cross the road? To get to the other side of the glass 🍹
3. What do you get when you mix a margarita with a joke? A salty joke
4. Why did the wineglass get arrested? For being intoxicated 🍷
5. What do you call a bartender who’s always getting his drinks mixed up? A cocktail connoisseur 🍸
6. What do you call a bartender who’s always getting into fights? A punchline
7. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting into mischief? A riot in a glass 🍹
8. What do you call a cocktail that’s always up for a good time? A party in a glass
9. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting lost? A Wanderlust 🍸
10. What do you call a bartender who’s always making mistakes? A mix-ologist 😂
11. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting its shots in? A shooter
12. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting into trouble? A bad influence 🍹
13. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people talking? A conversation starter
14. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people dancing? A groove juice
15. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people happy? A joy juice 🍷
16. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people thinking? A brain freezer
17. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people mellow? A chill pill
18. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people thirsty? A thirst quencher 🍹
19. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people feeling good? A feel-good fizz
20. What do you call a cocktail that’s always getting people feeling fabulous? A fabulous fizz 🍸

Anisia Avelino

Executiva de vendas externa – RGM Service